Animal; 705 Jokes

djuu6

Doctor: tumhari sehat bohat kharab hai,
cigrrete-noshi chor do.

.
.
Pathan: ye nahi ho sakta kyon k cigarrete to chor donga.

Magar noshi meri biwi hai.

by @irha@ (few years ago!)
makhi

Ek Pathan Ne Makhi K Par Kaat K Kaha
"Urr Ja..."
Jab Makhi Nahi Urri To Usney Kaha...

"Sabit Hota Hai K Makhi K Par Kaat
Diye Jaein To Wo "Behri" Ho Jati Hai

by @irha@ (few years ago!)
pathan

1 Pathan Cinema mai Film dekh raha tha.
.
Film mai 1 Shair dowarty howe araha tha.
.
Pathan ne dekha tu dar gia, owr apni chadir kandhy pa dal kar bhaagny laga
Logo ne kaha: Khan Sahib mat daro, yai tu film hai
.
Pathan: Wo tu mujh ko bhi pata hai ke yai film hai, lekin wo tu janwar hai, usko kia pata

by @irha@ (few years ago!)
jalse

Pone 2 Saal Pehle Humari Mulakat Imran Khan K Jalse Mein Hoi Aaj hum Mian Bivi Hain Ab Joriyan Asmano Pe Nai Imran K Jalson Mein Banti Hain… Shukaria Imran Khan….

by @irha@ (few years ago!)
Pathan

2009 Ka zalim SmS
.
Girl: KHAN SB Tum mujy subha sy ly kr sham tk or sham sy ly kr subha tk pyar kerna
.
PATHAN: oye Zalim ka bachi To phir hum NASWAR kab dalay ga

by Haris abbas Qureshi (few years ago!)
Gas Ho Gaye Hai

Patient: Doctor sahib mere pait

me bht gas ho gye hai

Doctor: Ahista bolo

Government ne sun liya to char

din ke liye bund ker denge. ;)

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Murghi k neik bachay

aik murghi ne 5 anday(eggs) diye or dua mangi kay bachay naik niklen
kuch dino baad bachay niklay
.
pehla namaz parhta hoa..
doosra tasbeeh parhta hoa.
teesra wuzoo krta hoa.
chotha naat parhta hoa.
panchva nai nikla to murghi pareshan ho gai...aur dua karnay lagi to anday se awaz ai ami main aitkaf main betha hua hoon.

by Kamran Hassan Qureshi (few years ago!)
Sara pani geela ho gia

Pathan baalti mai pani le ke ja raha tha, ke barish shuro ho gayi
Owr barish ka pani baalti mai chala gia
.
Pathan: Oho ! Sara pani geela hogia

by Mohammad Awais Rashid (few years ago!)
Pathan

Ques: Agar dunia mai bejli nahi hoti tu TV kesay daikhty?
.
Pathan: Mom-batti jala ke !

by Mohammad Awais Rashid (few years ago!)
Hoshyaar bander

Aik dafa aik topian bechne wala darakht ke neche so raha tha ke wahan pr bandron us ki sari topian le kr dal len jab wo utha to daikh preshan ho gya
phr use yaad aya ke us ke dada kehte the bander nakal utarte hain
yeh soch ker us ne apni topi phainkdi
jo topi us ne phainki thi wo aik bander ne utha li or kaha hamare dada ne bhi hamain bataya tha

by Mohammad Awais Rashid (few years ago!)
1 glass pani de do

Boy:abbu 1 glass pani dedo
abbu:khud uth k pe lo
boy:plz de do na
abbu:ab manga to thaphar marunga
boy:thapar marne ao to pani lete ana

by Sabir shah (few years ago!)
Husbanad wife larai

Husband wife lar rahe the
husband:tu kutti
wife: tu kutta
pas betha un ka acha bola:tommi

by Sabir shah (few years ago!)
American : "our dogs find bombs"

American : "our dogs find bombs"
Japanese : "our fish play footballs"
Pakistanis : "ye to kuch bhi nahi hamaray to
gadhay bhi sms parh laitay hain"...

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar Dharakt pe charha to upar bandar

Sardar Dharakt pe charha to upar bandar ne
pocha : Oper kyo aya?
Sardar: Apple Khanay
bandar: Yeh to aam ka darakht hai
Sardar: Pata hai, ais liye Apple sath laya hun

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
DO sardar jungle main ja rahy thay k ach

DO sardar jungle main ja rahy thay k achanak shair
( lion ) samnay a gaya .
1st sardar nay uski ankho main mitti daal di or
bhagnay laga.
1st sardar: o nus v ..!!
2nd sardar: mitti ty tu pai ay..tu nuss..!!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

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