Humor; 1383 Jokes

Ambulance Ke Liye Call Lagao..

Husband: Mere Seeny Me Bohat Dard Ho Raha Hai,
Jaldi Se Ambulance Ke Liye Call Lagao..

Wife: Haan, Lagati Hun,
Apne Mobile/Smartphone Ka Password Batao.

Husband: Rehne Do,
Ab Thora Theek Lag Raha Hai...;-p:)

by lescol (few months ago!)
Hospital

1 Hspitl k emrgncy ward mein hr Itwar sbha 11 bjay bed no15 pe jo bhi mariz hota wo mar jta:-O
jb mustqil esa hua to us jaga ko asib zda qarar dy diya gya:-/
yh pta lganay k lya k yhan aisa kiun ho raha hy,Itwar subha 11 se kuch dair phly 1 mariz ko bed no15 pr laya gya%-)
Hspitl ka pora amla or kuch molana bhi wahan mojod thy.
11 bajay hi emrgncy ward ka darwaza khula or 1 safai wala pathan andar aya or atay hi bed no 15 k Oxygen mchine ka plug nikal k apna moble chargng py lga dia:-D

by lescol (last year!)
Loan

1990 mian American bank ny "Bill Gates" ko 2 Lakh ka lone dainy sy inkaar kiya tha...

2001 main duniya k ameer tareen shaks "Bill Gates" ny wo bank khareed liya...

Or Aaj Ufone waloon ny mujhy loan dainy sy inkaar kya hy 15 rupee ka...

U just wait and watch...
(",)
<))>
_//_

Na Na Moafi ka to sawal hi paida ni hota sain..

by lescol (last year!)
More Bigger Hit

3 Idiots Would Have Been a More Bigger Hit.
If Kareena Kapoor Would’ve Also Once Said,
.
.
.
.
.
“Jahanpanaah Tussi Great Ho,
Tohfa Qabool Karo”

by Hassan Ali (few years ago!)
Teri sorat mere dil mai

Arz kya hy
Teri sorat mere dil mai kuch is tra se bus gai
Jese chotay rakshay main moti anti phas
gayi ...???

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
“JO” DAR GAYA,“WO” MAR GAYA”

Japan mein 2 dost thy.
1 ka nam tha “jo” aur dosry ka nam tha “wo”
aik din “jo” k pass jin aa giya “jo” ny dar kar “wo”
ko awaz di
“wo” bhag kar aaya to jin ko deikh kar “wo” ka
intaqal ho giya,
.
bas usi din sy hi kehty hain…
.
;
.
;
.
;
.
;
.
.
;
.
“JO” DAR GAYA,
“WO” MAR GAYA”

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
INTERVIEW : Imagine, in a closed room

INTERVIEW : Imagine, in a closed room , how can
you escape if it caught fire?
Sardar : Simple, stop imagining.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
1 Bar Jan Mang K To Dekho

1 Bar Jan Mang K To Dekho
1 Bar Yääd Kr K To Dekho
Agar Hum Na Aye To Samaj Lena
Salman Sutta Peya Ae,
Ty Mobile Silent Ty Vai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar:I really like u.

Sardar:
I really like u.
Girl:
Meri chappel ka size pata hai na?
Sardar:
Lo kar lao gal,
friendship hoi nae,
farmaeshaan shuru

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
MAMU :Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai,

MAMU :Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai, aaj din mein
kaise nikal aya?
GIRL :Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din mein kaise
bol pada? .

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
:Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya

PRINCIPAL :Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya
toh first time 100 Rs fine, 2nd time 200 Rs. Fine
and 3rd time 500.
MUNNA BHAI :Boley to Monthly paas ka kya lega
Mamu.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Funny Truth...

Funny Truth...
.
.
.
No one is as ugly as their identity card picture...
.
.
.
.
Nor as good looking as their facebook profile
picture.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
2 Lovers plan to suicide.

2 Lovers plan to suicide. Boy jumped first, Girl
closed her eyes & return back saying love is blind.
Boy in air opened his parachute saying love never
dies.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Agar 3 Din Tak Subha Nend Se

Agar 3 Din Tak Subha Nend Se
Jaag Kar Kangha Na Kia Jae
T0
Hair Style
"Rehman Malik"
Jesa Ho Jata Hai..
"Veena Returns"... ;->

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Boy to girl:- i can make u say I LOVE U ?

Boy to girl:- i can make u say I LOVE U ?
girl: no way !!
boy: bet ??
girl: yes ...
boy: OK start ... say blue?
......girl: blue..
boy: say pink?
girl: pink...
boy: say love?
girl: love ...
boy: whats 1+1?
girl: 2
boy: Ur age?
girl: 18
boy: hahaha... i told u i could make u say 18!!
girl: no, u said u could make me say that I LOVE U
boy: yes i did :D :D :D !!!!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

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