Animal; 711 Jokes

Indian Aur Kutto Mein Kya Farq Hai?

Ek Pakistani Ne Ek Indian Ko Chidane Ke Liye
Puchha
“Indian Aur Kutto Mein Kya Farq Hai?”
Indian Ne Muskurate Hue Bade Pyar Se Jawab Diya
“Sirf Border Ka“

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Aik kutta doosray se

Aik kutta doosray se:
Oye aaj kal jahan rush ho wahan se nikal jaya kr.
Doosra: Kyon?
Pehla: Salay, agr dhamaka hogya tu insanon ki moat
maray ga.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
In a group 3 friends were explaining

'In a group 3 friends were explaining to their 4th Pathan friend that Pathan’s a....'

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
1 jungle main

Sir: Ager tum 1jungle mein ho or wahan sheir aa
jaye to tum kya karo ge?
Boy: Main darakht per charhon ga
Sir: Ager wo sheir darkhat per b aa jaye to?
Boy: Main Pani mein kood jaun ga
Sir: Ager wo Pani mein b aa jaye to? . . .
Boy: Ustad G.. Sheir nal pen viyai hai jo odi side le
rae o…

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Aisa Kutta Naseeb Walo Ko Hi Milta Hai

Ek Pati Apni Patni Ka Janaza Le Ja Raha Tha.
Janaze Ke Aage Ek Kutta Aur Peeche Aadmiyon Ki
Lambi Line Thi.
Ek Aadmi Ne Ye Dekha Aur Jab Uski Samajh Mein
Na Aaya Ki Ye Kya Chakkat Hai To Jaakar Pati Se
Puchha.
Aadmi: “Bhai Sahab Ye Sab Kaise Hua?”
Pati: “Ye Jo Kutta Hai, Is Ne Kaat Liya Tha”
Aadmi Ne Kuch Socha Aur Bola: “Ye Kutta Ek Din
Ke Liye Udhar Mein De Do”
Pati: “Jarur, Par Peechhe Line Mein Lag Jao“

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Apki Hansi Pe DIL Qurban

Apki Hansi Pe DIL Qurban
-
Apki Muskan Pe ZINDGAI Qurban
-
Or Agr AP K
SMS Ana Band Hwe To
-
Ane wali
'BAKRA Eid'
Pe AP "QURBAN"

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Yahaan Kutte SusuKarte Hain

Ek Diwaar Par Likha Tha: “Yahaan Kutte Susu
Karte Hain”
Santa Ko Badi Zor Se Susu Aaya Thha, Usne Idhar
Udhar Dekha Ki Koi Bhi Nahi Dekh Raha To Waha
Susu Kar Diya.
Fir Muskura Kar Bola: “Ise Kehte Hai Dimaag, Susu
Maine Kiya Naam Kutte Ka Aaya“

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Santa Ki Research, Balle Ball

Santa Ne Ek Makkhi Pakdi Or Uske Pankh Todkar
Bola.
Santa: “Udd Jaa Furrrrrrrr!”
Makkhi Nahi Udi…
Fir Bola.
Santa: “Ja Udd Ja Aur Baag Ja”
Makkhi Fir Nahi Udi…
Santa Sochte Hue: “Hmmm, Isse Prove Hua Ki,
Agar Makhi Ke Pankh Tod Do To Wo Behri Ho Jati
Hai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Allama Iqbal ne prinday

Allama Iqbal ne prinday se Pucha k
Tumeh Asman se girney ka nahen ha dar?
Parinday ne Kaha k Iqbal Yar Tere Meharbani Inna
Na Sochia Kar

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
1 patan ko gadhay ne laat maari

1 patan ko gadhay ne laat maari
pathan ko boht ghussa aaya wo utha or gadhay ko 4
– 5 laaten maar kar bola:
tu kia samjhta hay mein tujh se kam hun.?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
American: Can U swim?

American: Can U swim?
Pathan: No
American: Dog is Better den u
bcz It Swims
Pathan: Can u swim?
American: Yes
Pathan: then whats the Difference between u &
Dog.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
kutty koleta hua dekha.

Aik sardar ny raod py khari car ke nichay kutty ko
leta hua dekha.
To kutty ko dum say khaincha our bola,
Baar nikal waada aya tu engineer!!!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Tumne kabhi Ullu dekha hai?

Angry boss: Tumne kabhi Ullu dekha hai?
Executive (sar jhukate hue): Nahin sir.
Boss: Niche kya dekh rahe ho ? Meri taraf dekho.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Santa zoo ka watchman

Santa zoo ka watchman tha. Zoo officer – Tumne
sher ka pinjra
lock nahi kiya?
Santa : Ki lod hai,
ennu kanjar nu kinne chori karna..?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
gaay(cow) ka doodh

Customer: Ek kilo gaay(cow) ka doodh dena.
Shopkeper: Lekin tumhara bartan toh bahut chhota
hai.
Customer: Theek hai toh phir bakri ka de de!!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

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