Medical; 622 Jokes

Good News And Bad News

At the doctor's office, Tom was getting a check up. "I have good news and bad news," says the doctor. "The good news is you have 24 hours left to live." Tom replies, "That's the good news?!" Then the doctor says, "The bad news is I should have told you that yesterday."

by Pak101.com (few months ago!)
Doctor sahib mujhy door ka nazar nahi ata

Mareez: Doctor sahib mujhy door ka nazar nahi ata !
Doctor: Asman par dekho, wo kia hai??
.
Mareez: Chand
Doctor: abhe es se agay kia farishty dekhega??

by Pak101.com (few months ago!)
Hospital gaya

Aik admi ki taang ki hadi toot gaye.
Hospital gaya to wahan dossray aadmi ki dono tangay toti dekh kar bola ....Kia aap ki 2 biwiyan hai.

by Pak101.com (few months ago!)
doctor log operation karne se pehle

Santa 2 Banta:
Yeh doctor
log operation karne se pehle
Patient ko behosh kyun karte hen?

Banta:
Kahen patient khud operation karna seekh na le is liye……

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji..

Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji.. aap papa ban
gaye.."
Sardarji - " Meri wife ko nahi bolna.. main use
SURPRISE

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Mareez Muje ajeeb se Bimari ho gayi hai

Mareez Muje ajeeb se Bimari ho gayi hai
Jab meri Biwi Bolti hai to mujhe Kuch Sunai nahi
deta
Dr: Ye Bimari nahi hai Aalah ki Maherbani hai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Doctor:Bache Ko Paani Dene Se

Doctor:Bache Ko Paani Dene Se Pehle Ubaal Dena
Chahiye,
Sardar:Woh To Thek Hai Par Ubaalne Se Bacha Mar
To Nhi Jaayega….

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar To Doctor: Aapne Nurse bhut Achi Rakhi

Sardar To Doctor: Aapne Nurse bhut Achi Rakhi
Hai, Uska Haath Lagte Hi Me Thek Hogaya,
Doctor:Jaanta Hoon Thapper Ki Awaaz Yahaan Tak
Aaye Thi….

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Doctor:Bache Ko Paani Dene

Doctor:Bache Ko Paani Dene Se Pehle Ubaal Dena
Chahiye,
Sardar:Woh To Thek Hai Par Ubaalne Se Bacha Mar
To Nhi Jaayega….

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Lady to Doctor: Mujhe Gas ki

Lady to Doctor: Mujhe Gas ki
problem hai par achhi baat ye hai ki meri gas me
na BadBu aati hai na Awaaz.
Aap k clinic me bhi 20 dafa gas chhod chuki hu par
kisi ko pata nahi chala..
Doctor: "Ye Dawa lijiye aur 1 week baad aayiye" .
(1 week baad) .
Old Lady:"Aap ne mujhe kya dawa de di? Meri gas
me ab bhi aawaz nahi aa rahi par
bahut Zehrili Badbu aa rahi hai" .
Doctor:"Good..! Aapki Naak theek ho gayi hai Ab
hum aap k KAAN ka ilaaj karenge....

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Colgate se daant saaf karne ka,

Colgate se daant saaf karne ka,
Pepsodent se majboot karne ka,
Babool se fresh karne ka..
Agar fir bhi safed nahi huye to..
Bindass HARPIC use karne ka..

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
10 Doctor aur 1 teacher helicopter

10 Doctor aur 1 teacher helicopter
ki rassi se latke the.
.
Pailot ne kaha, vajan jyada hai koi 1 Aadmi rasi
chood de
.
.
Teacher bola ye kurbani main
dunga. TALIYAN bajaiye
.
.
Aur sare Doctor taali bajane lage
aur Vajan kam ho gaya
Moral of the story :- chahe
Doctor ban jao par guru hamesa guru hihota hai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
1 Road pr koi mar Gya tha

1 Road pr koi mar Gya tha.
Rush lagne ki waja se 1 sardar ko Dekhne Ka Moqa
Na Mila to
sardar bola
HAT JAO YE MERA BAAP He
lash larki ki thi

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ek Clinic k aage lambi line thi

Ek Clinic k aage lambi line thi,
1Aadmi bar-bar line me ghusta tha,
par log usko pakar k piche phek dete the
Admi:"Lage raho, Saalo clinic hi nahi kholunga"

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ek pagal khali paper ko

Ek pagal khali paper ko bar bar choom raha tha
Doosra pagal: Ye kya hai?
Pahla: Love letter he
Doosra: Magar ye to khali he
Pahla: Aaj kal bol chaal band he :)

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

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