Animal; 711 Jokes

voda fone care

Called @ vodafone care

A girl picked up the phone

Girl: vodafone care mein aapka swaagat hai

Boy:thank u

Girl: mai aapki kya sahaayta kar sakti hu??

Boy:kya aap shaadi karna chahti hai mujhse??

Girl: jee aapne galat number laga diya hai


Boy:nai nai maine sahi number lagaya hai, aap shaadi karengi?

Girl: jee mai shaadi mein interested nai hu


Boy:arre madam sun toh lijiye ek baar

Girl: not interested

Boy:love marriage karengi toh honeymoon mein switzerland, arrange marriage karengi toh paris

Girl: jee mai aapse shaadi karna hee nai chahti toh aap offer kyu de rahe hai??

Boy:court marriage ka expense 10,000rs
Normal wedding ka expense 2,00,000rs
Muslim style wedding mein sirf 200rs


Girl: aapko samajh nai aata ki mujhe shaadi nai karni fir bhi aap samajte nai

Boy:ab pata chala madam aapko humara dard, jabki hume nai interest hota phir bhi aap humaari naak mein ungli karne baar baar call karti rehti hai


Girl shocked, boy rocked :-)

by Mohammad Awais Rashid (few years ago!)
When someone touch

When Some1 Touches U and U Don't Feel it, It's
Ignorance.
When Some1 Touches U and U feel it, It's Love.
When Nobody Touches U and U Still Feel it, Bhag le
beta "BHOOT" hai. :-)

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ullu dehka hai

Boss: Murkh Ho Tum
Tumne Kabhi Ullu Dekha hai?
Santa: Nahi Sir
Boss: Niche kya dekhta ha meri Or

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Kitna chota tanga

Santa Aur Banta Ne Zindagi Mai Pehli Baar
Rickshaw Dekha.
SantaL Dekho Kitna Chhota Tanga. Banta: Haan!
Aur Gadha to Dekho,
Aadmi Jaisa Dikhta Hai. :-)

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Kill a bird

How did Santa tried to kill a bird??
He took it to the top of a building and dropped it
from there to die.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar

ik sardar footboll ki team khelny gay to apni taraf hi 4 goal ka diye logon ny pocha sardar sahib apni taraf hi q goal kar rahy ho sardar replied that.......wo mje kaRNy hi nai dete me kia karon

by Haris abbas Qureshi (few years ago!)
Pedhne wala gafha

Banta sent sms to Santa: Bhejne wala mahan,
padhne wala gadha.
Santa got angry and replied: Bhejne wala gadha,
padhne wala mahan.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
MERI MURGI MAR GAYI

SANTA-KYU RO RAHE HO
BANTA- MERI MURGI MAR GAYI

SANTA- TO KYA HUYA MERA BAAP BHI MARA THA
LEKIN ME NHI ROYA

BANTA -ABE TERA BAAP KYA ANDE DETA THA

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
KUTTE mujhse dar k bhag jate he

Banta-Mai gali se jab guzarta hu to KUTTE mujhse dar k
bhag jate he

Santa-Apne BOSS se to har koi darta he

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Cow Per Bethey Ek Pathan Ko

Cow Per Bethey Ek Pathan Ko
Traffic-Police Ne Rok Kar Kaha
K Aapka Helmet Nahi Hai?
Chalan Hoga

Pathan: Dhiyaan Se Dekh Neechey Andhay Four Wheel Hai.

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
1xaadmi ne zoo main

1 Admi Ne Zoo Me 3 Zabanain Bolne Wala Tota
Dekha Jo
English, Urdu Or Memoni Bolta Tha.
Usne 3 Zabane Check Karne K Liye Ussy Pucha:
Who R U?
Tota: I’m Parrot
Admi: Tum Kon H0?
T0ta: Me T0ta Hun
Admi: Tu Keair Aye?
Tota: To Jo Pe..
Hakhrey Dafa Chui Deenun Toto Yaan, Samajh Me
Naiy Achni…:-)

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Dog's tail

Santa Was Inserting Dog’s Tail
Into Pipe
Banta: Oye, Kutte Ki Dum Kabhi
Seedhi Hui Hai Aajtak?
Santa: Idiot,Main To Pipe Bend
Kar Raha Hu

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ek sardar ne frog se pocha

Ek Sardar Ne Frog Se Pucha:
Sardaro Me Dimag Hota Hai?
Frog Ne Kaha Nahi Aur Pani Me Kood Gaya..
Sardar: Isne Sucide Kyu Kar Diya

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Bandar ban ker

Santa:Jab Me School Padta Tha Tab
Fancy Dress Competion Me BANDAR Ban K Gaya
Tha
2nd Prize Mila Tha
Banta: Abe Tu Aise Gaya Hota To 1st Milta

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ek chohe ne sherni ko

Ek Choohe Ne Sherni Ko Purpose Kia Sherni Ne
Kaha Abe Chal Tune
Apna Jism
Jaan Height Dekhi Hai
To Chooha Bola Madam In Sab Ko Choro Mera
Confidence Dekho

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

Most Viewed Jokes

A leopard went to see

Brilliant Santa

LOVE stands for

Jab Maine ache kapde Pehn

Sardar: Will u merry

Farak Ladke Aur Ladki Mein

Baap : Sharab, Cigarette,

Tumhare Papa Ka Kya Naam Hai?

Girlfriend Ke Liye Ek Joke

Pati Ko Saza Kaise Di Jaye

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