Search Results for 'Doctor'
Sardar on phone:
Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right now.
Doctor: Is this her first child?
Sardar: No this is her husband speaking…
by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)
A Doctor giving evidence in a courtroom is asked the question "Doctor, can
you tell the court the number of autopsies that have been performed by you on
dead people?"
"All of them were dead" replied the Doctor.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
A busy dentist and a patient:
Patient: Doctor, my teeth...
Doctor: I know what to do. Open your mouth.
When the patient opened his mouth and the dentist pulled three of his front teeth.
Patient: What have you done?!
Doctor: Its weird, I pulled three of your teeth without any bleeding.
Patient: Those were fake teeth.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Once a man ran to the Doctor,'
My wife accidentally drank some petrol. Now she is running in the house. What should I do?'
Doctor smiled, 'Lock all the doors and windows in the house. She will stop when the petrol is over.'
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Patient: I will be fine after the operation, right?
Doctor: yes. But the operation is very complicated. Nine out of ten people die after this operation.
Patient: What? Then how come you are getting sure about my safety?
Doctor: Maybe you are the luckiest tenth person.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Doctor!!
What happened?
I have fever.
Ok, go back to your home; take a bath with ice cold water, then lie under fan for 12 hours without any clothes. Come back tomorrow.
I will be fine then?
No. you will get Pneumonia.
What?
Don’t worry. I am only a Pneumonia specialist.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
In the operation theatre:
Patient: Doctor, please do the operation safely. This is my first operation.
Doctor: It’s my first operation too.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
'Dr. Smith is checking a little boy named Tom.
Placing the stethoscope he said,
'Naughty boy, now take a long breath and say Five, three times.'
Tom is great at math. He always gets 100 out of 100. He said quickly, 'Doctor, its 15!!'
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
A woman visited a Doctor.
Woman: Doctor, I have a problem. I am...
Doctor: I know your problem. You always dream that you have become a horse, right?
Woman: How do you know?!
Doctor: Your pony tail hair style.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Mr. Jones: Doctor, my son is having a problem.
He plugged up his ear and nose with chilies. Now he is screaming.
Doctor: That means he is not eating properly.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Doctor: Here is the medicine. Take four spoons daily.
Patient: But I don’t have four spoons in house. Do I have to buy one?
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher: Sir, why doctors wear a mask when they do an operation?
Student: For safety. If the patient dies, others can’t find out who did the operation.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Gareeb admi: Doctor sab mere paas paise nahi hain,
ap mera elaaj kar dein to kabhi apke kaam aunga
Dr: kya kaam karte ho?
gareeb admi: qabar khodta ho.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Doctor: Aap Ka Weight Kitna Hai?
Santa: Chashme(Opticals) K Saath 75kg
Doctor: Aur Chasme K Bina!
Santa: Vo Muje Dikhta Hi Nahi
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Doctor to Patient : The check which u gave me has returned back.
Patient to Doctor:The head-ache for which you gave me medicine has also returned back.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)