Search Results for '5'
1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If its in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
6. If its mine, it must never appear to be yours anyway.
7. If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If its broken, it's yours.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Some race horses staying in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record. "In the last 15 races, I've won 8 of them!"
Another horse breaks in, "Well in the last 27 races, I've won 19!!"
"Oh that's good, but in the last 36 races, I've won 28!", says another, flicking his tail.
At this point, they notice that a greyhound dog has been sitting there listening. "I don't mean to boast," says the greyhound, "but in my last 90 races, I've won 88 of them!"
The horses are clearly amazed. "Wow!" says one, after a hushed silence. "A talking dog."
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Pathan: Station Jany k Kitne Paise logay?
Ricksha Wala: 50
Pathan: 20 Lelo
Ricksha Wala: 20 Main kon Le Ker Jayega.
Pathan: Tum Peeche betho hum le k jayega
by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)
Postman: I have to come 5 miles to deliver you this packet.
Blonde: Why did you come so far. Instead you could have posted it..
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Larkay wale:
Aap ki beti kuch karti hai?
Larki ki amma…
Haan jii
MASHAALLAH
Rozana 3 rupee mai 500 sms krti hai..A.M.A
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Pathan Doctor Se: Mere Wazan Bhot Ho Gaya Hai
Doctor: Tum Rozana 5 kilo Meter Padel Chalo
1 Saal Baad pathan Ne Doctor Ko Call Ki,
O Tera Khana kharab khabees Wazan Tu Kam Ho Gaya Hai
Magar Hum
“AFGHANISTAN” Puchnch Gaya Hai
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Height Of Student Talent:
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Teacher: U Just Got 5 Marks & Still U R Laughing..
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.
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Student: I’m Wondering How I Got 5 Marks..
I Wrote only some Lyrics
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
1 Sardar Ne Pehlwan Ko Car Se Takkar Maar Di
Pehlwan Ne Sardar Ko Car Se Nikala aur Car Se 10 meter Door Khara Kr K Road Par 1 Line Lgai aur Kaha K
“AGAR Is Line Se Idhar Aya To Maar Dalun ga”
or Khud Danday Se Car Tornay Lga.
jb Car Ka kafi Nuqsan kr Lia to Peechay Mur K Dekha To Sardar Zor Zor Se Hans Raha Tha.
Pehlwan: Tum Q hans Rahe Ho?
SARDAR: Hanstay huwey
TU gaddi Torr Rya C ty Me 5 Wari Lane Cross Keeti A
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ek budiya cinema hall me cold drink ki bottle leke baithi thi,
Kabhi 15 mint me ghunt leti to kabhi 20 mint me,
Pass bethe sardar ko gussa aa gaya,
usne botal uthai aur puri ek ghut me pi gaya aur bola:-Aise pi jata he cold drink.
Budhiya boli:Beta me to pan ki pichkari thuk rahi thi
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
After Examination
1st Benchers : Paper tough tha, par 95 to pakke hai,
2nd Benchers : Arey yaar ek question to fir bhi reh hi gaya,
3rd Benchers : Pass ho jaunga basitna pata hai
4th Benchers : Waat lag gayi yaar mai to pakka fail hu,
Last benchers : "Abe Paper ko maar goli, Madam kya maal thi,
Samajh hi nahi aa raha tha paper ko dekhu ya madam ko"
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Wife called her husband
Wife: honey where are you?
Husband: I'm at the bank.
Wife: dear, please I need 3000 rupees to activate my blackberry,
5000 to do my hair and
10,000 to buy a dress.
Husband: sorry, I meant I was at the "bank" of a river.
Do you want fish to cook?
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Husband or Us Ki Wife me jhagra hua,
Wife ne apni Maa ko phone kiya: Ami mera husband Se jhagra ho gya hai, Main 3,4 mahino k liye ap k ghr aa rahi ho,
Maa boli: Jhagra us kambakht ne kiya hai to Saza bhe usy he Milni chahiye , Tu wahin ruk Main 5,6 mahino k liye aa rahi hon
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Wife : Honey,where are you?
Husband : I'm at the bank.
Wife : Dear, please I need 3000 bucks to activate my blackberry, 5000 to do my hair and 10,000 to buy a dress.
Husband : Sorry, I meant I was
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at the "bank" of a river.
Do you want fish??? xP=P
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
1 Building k 100th Floor par 3 Dost rehte the.
1 din Lift khrab thi, Unhon ne Sirrhiyon se uper janey ka faisla kiya.
Boriyat se bachney k liye ye Decide kiya k
1st Friend kisi Jung ki story sunaye ga,
2nd koi Funny story, aur
3rd koi Sad story.
1st ne Jung ki story sunai aur 50 floor tak pohanch gaye,
2nd ne Funny story sunai aur wo 99 floor tak pohanch gaye,
Phir 3rd Sad story sunaty houy rony lga aur kaha k GADI DI CHABI FLAT VICH REH GAI A
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
5 years old boy: I Love u Mom
Mom: Awww I Love u Too
16 years Old Boy: I Love u Mom
Mom: Sorry, I Have No Money
25 years Old Boy: I Love u Mom
Mom: Kon hai ? Kahan rehti hai wo kamini ? :@
Moral : Maa Sab Janti hai
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)