Search Results for 'Doctor'

Sardar and doctor

Sardar 2 doctr: Mujhe 1 problem hai
DR: Kya?
Sardar: Baat karte waqt aadmi dikhai nahi deta
Dr: aisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Trouble sleeping

The woman seated herself in the psychiatrists
office. "What seems to be the problem?" the
doctor asked.
"Well, I, uh," she stammered. "I think I, uh, might
be a nymphomaniac."
"I see," he said. "I can help you, but I must advise
you that my fee is $80 an hour."
"That's not bad," she replied. "How much for all
night?"

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
I always see spots

Patient: I always see spots before my eyes. Doctor: Didnt the new glasses help? Patient:

Sure, now i see the spots much clearer.

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Today dinner. .

Sardarji Standing Below A Tube Light With A Open
Mouth..
WHY?Because His Doctor Advised Him “Todays
Dinner Should Be Light”

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
There's teachers

The children had all been photographed, and the
teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a
copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when
you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer,
she's a lawyer,' or 'that's Michael. He's a doctor.'"
A small voice at the back of the room rang out,
"And there's the teacher. She's dead."

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Rat ka time

Raat ka time jab Munna aur Chinkie apnay bed
room mien so rahay thay to phone ki ghanti baji.
Voice: Aray doctor sahab jaldi aayeay! Meray betay
nay blade kha liya hai.
Munna abhi jaanay k liye tayyar hi hota k dobara
phone aata hai.
Voice: Doctor Sahab! Aab aanay ki koi zaroorat
nahi, meray husband ko shave k liye doosra blade
mil gaya hai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Blind man

Chiman: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun
to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai,
aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Chiman: Phone karte waqt.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Shanti ko bulao

Santa: Kaam wali shanti ko bulao.!
Wife: Kyun?
Santa: Doctor ne kaha hai, raat mein dawa khane
ke baad shanti ke saath so jaana.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
I eat fruit

Every time I eat fruit..
Patient: 'Doctor, every time I eat fruit I get this
strange urge to give people all my money.'
Doctor: 'Would you like an apple or a banana?'

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
X_ray

Patient: Doctor, what does the X-ray of my head
show?
Doctor: Absolutely nothing!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Need glasses

I think I need glasses
Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses.
Teller: You certainly do! This is a bank.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Some dreams

A man who was very upset walked in to see his
doctor.
“Doctor, you’ve got to help me!” he wailed.
“What seems to be the trouble?” asked the doctor.
“I keep having the same dream, night after night.
There’s this door with a sign on it, and I push and
push the door but I can’t get it open.”
“What does the sign say?” asked the Doctor.
“Pull,” said the patient.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Best friend

The patient shook his doctor’s hand in gratitude
and said,
“Since we are the best of friends, I would not
want to insult you by offering payment. But I
would like for you to know that I had mentioned
you in my will.”
“That is very kind of you,” said the doctor
emotionally, and then added,
“May I see that prescription I just gave you? I d
like to make a little change…”

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sick brother

Jack: “My brother was sick and went to the
doctor.” John: “Is he feeling better now?” Jack:
“No, he has a broken arm.” John: “How did he
break it?” Jack:
“Well, the doctor gave him a prescription and told
him no matter what happened, to follow that
prescription. And the prescription blew out of the
window.” John: “How did he break his arm?” Jack:
“He fell out of the window trying to follow the
prescription.”

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Professionals

A doctor and his wife were sunbathing on a beach
when a beautiful young woman in a very slight,
very tight bikini strolled by.
The near-naked woman looked at the doctor,
smiled, and said in a sexy voice: “Hi there
handsome. How are you doing?”
She then wiggled her backside and walked off.
“Who was that?” demanded the doctor’s wife.
“Err… Just a woman I met professionally,” replied
the doctor.
“Oh yeah?!” snarled his wife, “Whose profession?
Yours or hers?”

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
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