Search Results for 'body'

Having problem

A teacher was having trouble teaching arithmetic
to one little boy. So she said, "if you reached in
your right pocket and found a nickel, and you
reached in your left pocket and found another one,
what would you have?" "Somebody else's pants."

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Police station

A man went to police station to report that his
wife was lost & missing. There he found another
person reporting the same.
The police man asked the person who was there
earlier, "How does your wife look like??"
That man replied, "She is a smart, good looking
woman, 5 feet 8 inch, 36-28-32, beautiful &
attractive body with blonde hairs"
Police man noted down those details and asked the
other person, "What does your wife look like?"
He said in excitement, "Forget mine, let's go and
find his wife!!!"

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Programmer in sea

Once a programmer drowned in the sea. Many Marines where at that time on the beach, but the programmer was shouting "F1 F1" and nobody understood it.

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Commit suicide

Chiman is trying to commit suicide on the railway
tracks...takes along some wine and chicken with
him.
Somebody stops him and asks,
'Kyon bhai ye sab kyun leke baithe ho?'
Chiman replies, 'Saali train late aati hai
kahin bhook se na marjaun..'

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Don't care

The ninety-year-old man was in for his checkup
when the nurse practitioner learned he was about
to marry an eighteen year old girl.
“Now, Mr. Jenkins,” the nurse practitioner warned,
“you should know that when a man your age
marries an eighteen-year-old girl, somebody could
get hurt.”
The old man shrugged, “If she dies, she dies.”

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
What is your problem?

Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?
Patient: Doctor, I keep getting the feeling that
nobody can hear what I say.
Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
train ka name

Ager trains k naam Pakistani Actresses k naam pe
hotey tou khabrain aisi hotin:
Aaj Reema overload ho kr gai!!
Saima k neechay aa k aik banda halaak!!
Accident main Shahida Minni ki pichli bogi tabbah!!
Tez raftaari ki wja se LAILA patri se uter gai!!
Meera pe charhne waalon ki tadaad main izafa!!
Nirma chalte chalte band ho gai!!
Khushbu ki body change karne ka faisla!!
Nargis per ghair qanooni tor per charhey huay 7
afraad ko saza!!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Suicide

Chiman is trying to commit suicide on the railway
tracks...takes along some wine and chicken with
him.
Somebody stops him and asks,
'Kyon bhai ye sab kyun leke baithe ho?'
Chiman replies, 'Saali train late aati hai
kahin bhook se na marjaun..'

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
One day in class

One day in class, the teacher told everyone to turn
to a blank sheet of paper in their notebooks. She
noticed that Chip, the dumb jock, was having
trouble with her directions.
"Have you found a blank piece yet, Chip?" said
the teacher.
"Nope. I haven't," said the dumb jock. "Somebody
went through and drew lines across all of the
pages."

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
new teacher

New Teacher: "Anbody Who Thinks He Is Stupid, Stand Up"

Pathan Stoodup.

Teacher: Are You Stupid?

Pathan: Nahi! Aap Akeli Khari Thin. Mujhe Acha Nahi Lag raha Tha.

by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)
A kangaroo kept getting

A kangaroo kept getting out of his enclosure at the zoo. Knowing that he could jump high, the zoo officials put up a ten-foot fence.
But he was out the next morning, just roaming around the zoo.

The next day, a twenty-foot fence was put up. Again he got out.

When the fence was forty feet high, a camel in the next enclosure asked the kangaroo, “How high do you think they’ll go?”

The kangaroo said, “About a thousand feet, unless somebody locks the gate at night!”

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
There was once a snail

There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow. He decided to get some fast wheels to make up the difference. After shopping around a while, he decided that the Datson 240-Z was the car to get. So the snail goes to the nearest Datsun dealer and says he wants to buy the 240-Z, but he wants it repainted "240-S".

The dealer asks, "Why 'S'?"

The snail replies, "'S' stands for snail. I want everybody who sees me roaring past to know who's driving."

Well, the dealer doesn't want to lose the unique opportunity to sell a car to a snail, so he agrees to have the car repainted for a small fee.

The snail gets his new car and spent the rest of his days roaring happily down the highway at top speed. And whenever anyone would see him zooming by, they'd say "Wow! Look at that S-car go!"

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
A blonde told her doctor

A blonde told her doctor that she was really worried because everypart of her body hurt.The Doctor looked concern & said,"show me where."

The Blonde touch her own arm and screamed,"ouch!"she looked at the doctor and said "see?It hurts everywhere!"

The doctor laughed and said ,"Don't worry ;it's not serious.You have just got a broken index finger."

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar: Doctor Sahib poray jism mai kahin

Sardar: Doctor Sahib poray jism mai kahin bhi ungli lagawon tu boht dard hota hai
Doctor did X-ray of his all body and found that he has FRACTURE in his FINGER

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
train names

Ager trains k naam Pakistani Actresses k naam pe hotey tou khabrain aisi hotin: Aaj Reema overload ho kr gai!! Saima k neechay aa k aik banda halaak!! Accident main Shahida Minni ki pichli bogi tabbah!! Tez raftaari ki wja se LAILA patri se uter gai!! Meera pe charhne waalon ki tadaad main izafa!! Nirma chalte chalte band ho gai!! Khushbu ki body change karne ka faisla!! Nargis per ghair qanooni tor per charhey huay 7 afraad ko saza!! 

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
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