Suicide
Chiman is trying to commit suicide on the railway
tracks...takes along some wine and chicken with
him.
Somebody stops him and asks,
'Kyon bhai ye sab kyun leke baithe ho?'
Chiman replies, 'Saali train late aati hai
kahin bhook se na marjaun..'
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!) / 894 views
Similar Jokes
Arz kya hy
Teri sorat mere dil mai kuch is tra se bus gai
Jese chotay rakshay main moti anti phas
gayi ...???
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ann: What does your husband do?
Liza: What a husband should do.
Ann: I’m not asking about the night, but the day.
Liza: OK. He does the same during the day too.
Ann: I’m asking what he does for a living!!
Liza: That’s what I’m answering. He is so excited all the time. Day or night, it doesn’t make any difference to him. He is always in the bedroom.
Ann: A s*x maniac?
Liza: No, not at all. He is always in bedrooms breaking the lockers. He is a burglar
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Bhikari: Baboo 10 Rs. ka sawal hai, chaay (Tea) peenee hai.
Aadmee: Lykin chaay tu 05 Rs. ki aati hai.
Bhikari (sharmatay hoay): Woh meri girl friend bhi saath hai.
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
Santa:
Main Apna Purse Ghar Bhool Aaya
Mujhe 1000 Rs Chahiye
Banta:
Dost Hi Dost K Kam Aata Hai
Le 10 Rs
Riksha Kar Aur Ja K Purse Le Aa
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Kon Banai ga Karor Pati?
Pathan: Me.
Q: what is your father name?
Options:
A.Dilawer
B.Changez
c.Feroz
d.Sultan
Pthan: Life line 50/50.
A. Dilawer
c. Feroze
Pathan: Audience Vote,
75% Dilwer
25% Feroze
Pathan: my last line phone a friend.
Kis ko call karen gai?
Pathan: Apne baap dilawer ko.........!
by Raju (few years ago!)
Paise wala aadmi:” aaj mere paas
14 cars
18 dukaan
4 Bangle hain..
Tumhare paas kya hai ??
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Gharib aadmi:” mere paas 1 beta
hai,
jiski girlfriend teri beti hai…:P:P
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
A serious thought
umar ki raah mein jazbaat badal jaate hai
Waqt ki aandhi mein halaat badal jaate hai
Sochta hoon kaam kar kar ke record tod du
Lekin kambakht salary dekte hi khayaal badal jaate hai
by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Ek Train Ulatne Ka Case Adalat Me Tha Train Ka Driver Jo K Pathan Tha Us Se Pocha K Tum Ne Train Patri Se Q Utari?
Pathan: Oo Yaara 1 Banda Samne Aa Gaya Tha
Brake Maarne Ka Time Nahi Tha.
Humara Officer Ne Bola K Is K Uppar Charha Do.
Wakel: Phir?
Pathan: Wo Banda Patri Se Uttar Gaya… ;-(
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
ek din ek aadmi naha do kar bahar nikla, jaise weh nikla bahar us pe ek kabuter gober kar diya toh wah gusse mein aakar kahan ki are oh kabuter tuh chaddi nahi panta kya????
toh kabuter bola kyu tum loge pehan ke karte ho kya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
You'll need the following: a cup of water, a cup of sugar, four large eggs, two cups of dried fruit, a teaspoon of baking soda, a teaspoon of salt, a cup of brown sugar, lemon juice, nuts, and a bottle of whisky.
Sample the whisky to check for quality.
Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again. To be sure it is the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again.
Make sure the whisky is still okay. Cry another tup. Turn off the mixer. Break two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the whisky to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the whisky. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.
Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window, check the whisky again and go to bed.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)