Search Results for 'HEAD'
Wilfred had just learned his abc's and was very
scared of doing them in front of the class. The
teacher, though, told him that the best way to
conquer his fears would be to just go ahead and
do it. So, trembling, he stood in front of the class
and began.
"ABCDEFGHIJLKMNOQRSTUVWXYZ."
"Very good, Wilfred. But you forgot the P. Where's
the P?
"It's running down my leg."
by khalid hussain (few years ago!)
Mom; Can You Get Me A Drink ?
Me; Cola Or Pepsi ?
Mom; Cola
Me; Normal Or Diet ?
Mom; Normal
Me; Can Or Bottle ?
Mom; Bottle
Me; 1L Or 0.5l ?
Mom; Screw It Give Me Water .-.
Me; Normal Or Carbonated ?
Mom; NORMAL !!!
Me; Warm Or Cold ?
Mom; Get Out !
Me; Now Or Later ?
Mom; Im Going To Kill You ! .-.
Me; With A Knife Or Gun ?
Mom; GUN !
Me; In The Head Or Body ?
Mom; YOU KNOW WHAT I LL GET IT MY SELF N0W GET LOST
by Mohammad Awais Rashid (few years ago!)
Santa Hair cutting k kitne lete ho?
Banta Barber:- Rs 30
Santa:- Shaving ke?
Banta:- Rs10
Santa:- Shave My Head
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
A woman runs into a doctor’s office and says “DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts!” The doctor replied, “Show me.” So the woman poked her ankle and screamed of pain. Then she poked her knee and yelled OW. She poked her forehead and screamed again. She was about to continue when the doctor said, “That’s enough, let me think this over.” He thought for about a minute and said “I think I know what your problem is. You broke your finger.”
by inayat khan (few years ago!)
A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
by inayat khan (few years ago!)
A masked man walks into a bank and holds it up at gunpoint to rob the bank. In the process of robbing the bank, his mask fell off. He quickly put it back on his face and asked the teller directly ahead of him if she saw his face. She admitted that she did, so he shot and killed her. He then turned to the teller that was beside the one her just killed and asked if she had also seen his face. She said that she did and he shot and killed her too. He then turned to a man, a customer who just happened to be in the bank when the robbery was taking place. The robber asked the customer if he had seen his face. The customer replied, “No, but I’m pretty sure my wife did.”
by inayat khan (few years ago!)
At the scene of an accident a man was crying:
O God! I have lost my hand , oh!
Santa: Control yourself. Don’t cry. See that man.
He has lost his head. Is he crying?
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar: What Is The Cost Of Hair Cut? Barber: Rs
20
Sardar: Then What Is The Cost Of Shaving?
Barber: Rs 10
Sardar: Oh! Ok Plz Shave My Head!!!
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Gang of Santa-Banta broke a bank, but instead of
cash they find bottles of chilled red wine...
happily they drink and left
next day headline
~ Braking News ~
"Blood Bank Robbed"
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Exam ki rat ko student ne toss kia Head aya to Sona h
Tail aya to Film dkhnga
kharra raha to Gane sunuga
Or agr hawa mai raha to
qasm se puri rat parhunga.
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank.
Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled
Red Wine,
Happily they drank & went away.
Next day Headline aai: Blood Bank lutya gya
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Police Man: Stop, Stop, Tumhari Headlights kaam
Nahi kar rahi,
Woh bandh hai.
Santa: Jaldi Se Hat Jao! Brakes Bhi Kaam Nahi Kar
Rahe Hain. :-)
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank.
Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled Red Wine,
Happily they drank & went away.
Next day Headline aai: Blood Bank lutya gya
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Rajnikanth enters BIGG BOSS 4. Next day.
Rajnikanth chahte hai ki BIGG BOSS confession
room me aayein! Rajnikanth has counted infinity
twice. Part of apple`s logo that is missing was
eaten by Rajnikanth.
Rajnikanth doesn`t shave. He just looks in the
mirror and dares hair to grow. Headlines of Today:
Ek train cycle ki chapet
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Three men were flying in a plane.
One dropped out an apple the other dropped an
orange and the other dropped a grenade.
After landing they were walking down the street
and saw a kid crying.
They asked him why he was crying and he said "an
apple hit me in the head".
Then they saw another kid crying he said "an
orange hit me in the head".
Then they saw a kid laughing his head off and they
asked him what was so funny he said
"I farted and my house blew up!"
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)