As I sit here I'm contemplating having a vasectomy, you know... the "removing" of your manhood. You know, it looks like a relatively simple procedure, heck I even asked if they had a do-it-yourself kit (true story). Afterall, $950 bucks for a 15 minute snip-snip is kinda excessive. At any rate, I won't be cutting on my balls anytime soon - but I do have some vasectomy jokes (more of a timeline of events) if you're in the same mood I am. We'll call him "Bill" and this is his story.
It's A Family Decision

VasectomyBill was at his family doctor for his annual physical exam. His doctor returned, filling out a bunch of stuff on his chart, and boasted "Your checkup went well, everything looks to be in order. Is there anything that you'd like to ask me?"

"Well," Bill mumbles, "Actually, I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."

"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked this over with your family?"

"Yeah, and they're in favor 9 to 2."
Right After The Operation

Bill wakes up from a vasectomy and the doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. "The good news is we were able to save your testicles. The bad news is they're under your pillow."
What Really Happened To Bill

While doing the vasectomy, Bill's doctor slipped and cut off one of his testicles. In an effort to avoid a malpractice lawsuit, he replaced Bill's missing ball with an onion.

Two weeks later, Bill returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doc asked. "Pretty good, but I've had some strange side effects." "Like what?" the nervous doc asked anxiously. "Well, every time I pee my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on."
Post-Op Final Check-Up

Six weeks after his vasectomy, Bill returns to his doctor for his scheduled semen test. The nurse hands him a little jar and points to a broom closet down the hall. After half an hour, he still hasn't come out - and a line is forming! So she puts her ear to the door to see if he is ok. All she can hear is lots of heavy breathing and grunting, so she goes back to her station and tells the other guys to wait their turn. Fifteen minutes later the guy finally comes out, red in the face and sweating. "I've tried everything," he says. "I've pulled it, I've twisted it, I've even pounded it on the sink, but I *still* can't open this damn jar!"

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 1218 views

Ek ladka ladki ko

Ek ladka ladki ko dekhne gaya
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Ladke ne english me baat karne ki sochi Aur bola- English chalti hai na ?
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Ladki sharmate hue-
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SODA saath ho to DESI bhi chalti hai

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)

"Kya Aapki 2 Biwian Hain?

1 Aadmi ki 1 Taang ki Haddi Toot Gae??Hospital Gaya To wahan Doosray Aadmi ki Dono Tangain Tooti Dekh kr Bola ??.?.?.?.?.?.??"Kya Aapki 2 Biwian Hain?

by Muneeb Alam (few years ago!)

1 din papu 4 bje uth gya

1din Papu 4 bje uth gya
Ma-Papu mera putr, Papu mera sher, padh likh k
paisa kamaega dher.
Papu-Na main tera putr, na koi sher, susu karn
utha si, so jaunga fer

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

Do u know English??

Santa: Do you know English? Banta: Yes Santa: Ok!
Then tell what is the opposite of NAAG PANCHAMI?
Banta: So simple Yaar... NAAG DO NOT PUNCH ME.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

Teacher Pappu Se Puchhta Hai

Teacher Pappu Se Puchhta Hai.
Teacher: “Tumhare Papa Kya Karte Hai?”

Pappu: “Sir, Wo Roz Galiyaan Khaate Hai”

Teacher: “Kya Matlab Hai Tumahara?”

Pappu: “Ji, Wo Customer Care Executive Hai“

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)