jokes collection by khurrambaber - General Talks - Pakistan's Largest Infotainment Portal

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khurrambaber Age: 42 5066 days old here Total Posts: 2400 Points : 60 Location: gujranwala, Pakistan Status : Offline	Subject : jokes collection by khurrambaber (closed) Aik sardar ko exam my koi swal nahe ata tha,srdar ny hr swal ky nechay \|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\| is tara ke lines laga de or lika Scratch kr ky answer parhlen. Like no likes.
	Posted on June, 06 2011 03:38:52 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik saheb station ki taraf jatay huye logon say pooch rahay the.
Station idhar hi hai.

Har koi jawaban kehta. Aaho

Aik khush posh saheb say jab inhon nay yahi sawal poocha to inhon nay jawab dia. Ji han

Woh saheb poochnay lagay. bhayi baaqi sab logon nay to aaho kaha hai. aap nay ji han kaha hai. farq kia hai?

Woh saheb akar kar bolay. janab parhay likhay aur mohazzib log ji han kehtay hain jabkeh un parh aur jahil qisam kay log aaho kehtay hain.

In saheb nay pucha. Kia aap parhay likhay hain?
Woh saheb foran bolay. aaho

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:16:40 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Larka: aik litter bhains ka doodh day do.

Dhood wala tumhara tartan chota hai.

Larka acha to phir bakri ka hi day do.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:18:32 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Hotal mein thehray huye aik shakhs nay hotal kay malik ko jhan’jhor kar uthatay huye kaha.

Khuda ra jaldi uthye meri biwi khirki say kood kar khood kasha karna chahti hai.

To mein is silsilay mein aap ki kia madad kar sakta hon. Malik nay hairani say pucha.

Woh dar asal kamray ki khirki nahi khul rahi. Woh shakhsh jhonjhla kar bola.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:19:59 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik shakhs beghair ticket train mein safar kar raha tha. Jab ticket checker ticket check karnay aaya to is nay namaz shuru kar di. Ticket checker birth par baith gia.

Jab is shaksh nay namaz khatam ki to is ki nazar ticket chekar par pari. Is nay foran kaha. Hazar rikat namaz sunnat Allah Akbar.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:23:01 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik dehati shehar gia. Is kay pichay aik kutta(DOGS) dor para. Dehati nay pathar uthana chaha. Magar zameen kay sath jura hua tha. Dehati nay kaha. Yeh ajeeb jagah hai yehan kutton (DOG) ko khula chor detay hain aur pathar ko baandh detay hain.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:24:26 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Husband wife say begum raat ko ghar mein chor ghus aaye aur sara saman lay gaye aur inhon nay mujhay murgha bana kar mara pita.
Wife: aap nay shor kiun nahi macha ya.

Husband: wah bhala mein koi darpoke hon jo shor machata.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:25:44 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik truck aur rickshaw ki aapas mein takkar ho gayi. Aik rah geer nay haadsay ki jagah par mojood dusray shakhs say pucha.

Bhayi jaan. Yeh haadsah kaisay pesh aaya?

Dusray shakhs nay jawab dia. Allah behtar janta hai. nishanah to inhon nay kisi rah geer ka hi lia hoga. Pata nahi aapas mein kaisay takra gaye.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:34:58 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Allah ki panah….tum nay apni tangain kis buri tarah say turwalein. Aakhir yeh hua kaisay?

Doctor nay muainah karnay kay baad mareez say pucha.

Aadat ki wjah say. Mareez nay afsurdagi say jawab dia.

Dar asal ……… mein nay cigarette man hole mein phenka aur isay joton say masalnay ki koshish ki.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:37:44 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik paithan naya naya Saudi Arab gia hua tha. Wahan is kay samnay do Arbon ki larayi huyi jab police aayi to is Pathan say in donon ki larayi kay baray mein pucha to paithan nay kaha.

Mujhay to aur kuch pata nahi, bas donon nay kuch aayat parhin aur larnay lagay.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:39:42 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Pathan ki biwi: sohag raat ko boli,
khan aaj aap jo maango gay main doon gi.

Pathan: khushi say
Acha tum meri maa k pass soo jao aur

Apnay bahi ko meray pass bejh do

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:41:14 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik umeed war ka interview ho raha tha aur isay yaqeen tha keh woh yeh mulazmat zarur hasil kar lega interview kay aakhir mein interview lenay walay saheb nay pucha keh acha yeh bata yain keh "Ga Pu Ji Ga Gum Gum ka kia matlab hai.

Umeedwar nay pehlay to buhat soncha phir mayusi say bola "is ka matlab yeh hai keh mujhay yeh nokri nahi mil sakti hai .

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:43:04 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Umeedwar nay pehlay to buhat soncha phir mayusi say bola "is ka matlab yeh hai keh mujhay yeh nokri nahi mil sakti.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:45:48 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik director bachat karnay ka aadi tha. Hamesha situation kay mutabiq qudrati location talash karta aur beghair set lagaye film band kar leta. Aik scine tha jis mein hero nay aik rahgeer say mar khani hoti hai. Director puray unit ko bus stand par lay gia aur hero ko samjhaya keh woh dekho aik bd surat langur numa shakhs kay baazu mein Hur numa larki hai tum ja kar isay chero mein film taiar kar leta hon.

Hero siti bajata hua is shakhs kay pas poncha aur poocha. Kia yeh itni bdsurat biwi aap ki hai? aur thappar khanay ki umeed mein apna munh kuch aagay kar dia. woh shakhs kuch na bola. Is par hero nay apna sawal dohraya. is par woh shakhs apni biwi ki taraf motawajjah hua aur bola.

dekha. Sirf mein hi nahi sari dunya tumhain bd surat kehti hai.

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Posted on May, 31 2014 08:47:26 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik nayi dolat mand aurat nay apni saheli say kaha, patah nahi kaisay log hain jo dolat pakar apni haisyat bhool jatay hain, mujhay dekho khuda ka dia sab kuch hai magar aaj tak apni tareef nahi ki, na hi shekhi baghari! Acha! Tum baitho mein tumharay liye juice bana kar laati hon.

Saheli nay kaha .......Aray choro! Takalluf bazi!

Aurat boli! Nahi nahi takalluf ki kia baat! Gol kamray ki bari aabnoshi table kay paas full size fridge aur color TV, VCR kay pichay jo shelf hai na, is mein deck kay qareeb hi juicer para hua hai bas abhi bana kar laati hon.

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Posted on June, 01 2014 03:11:06 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Baap nay ghussay mein apnay chotay betay ko martay huye kaha tumhein sharm nahi aati jo apnay Dada kay dushmanon say dosti kartay ho.

Betay nay pucha: Aakhir aisi kia baat ho gayi thi keh yeh dushmani chali aarahi hai.

Hamaray dushmanon nay tumharay Dada ko akhrot diye the jabkeh tumharay Dada kay dant(teeth) nahi the. Baap nay kaha.

Isi doran bara beta hath mein pistol lay kar dakhil hua aur kehnay laga: Abba jaan! Mein nay badla lay lia hai.

Ketno ko maar daala hai? baap nay bay qarari say poocha.

Kisi ko nahi, mein to is kay ganjay Dada ko kanghi(comb) day aaya hon.

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Posted on June, 01 2014 03:13:23 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Pehla dost (doosre dost se): is bar tumhein salgirah mein kia kia gift mile?

Doosra dost ne kaha: gift to buhat mile lekin aik baja buhat acha hai aisa gift is se pehle kabhi nahi mila.

Pehla: is mein aisi kia khas baat hai?

Doosra: Ammi mujhe is ko na bajane key liye rozana 5 ropey deti hain.

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Posted on June, 01 2014 03:17:03 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Apne shagirdon ko bijli ke bare mein batate huye primary school key teacher ne munasib samjha keh roz marrah zindagi mein se misalein di jayein chunancha inhon ne aik shagird ko khare hone ka isharah karte huye kaha

Farz karo mein pankhe (fan) ka button dabata hon lekin fan nahi chalta to is ka kia mtlab hai.

Shagird ne jawab dia: yahi keh aap ne bijli ka bil ada nahi kia hai.

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Posted on June, 01 2014 03:18:20 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Aik Kanjoos lakh pati se marne ke baad farishte ne poocha : tum ne dunya mein koi neki ki ho to batao?

Kanjoos ne jawab dia: aik din mein ne faqir ko aik rupyah dia tha, aik martabah mohalle ki masjid mein lota rakhwaya tha aur aik bar hospital ko 5 rupay diye the.

Farishte ne kaha: yeh lo apne 6 rupay aur aik lota aur dozakh mein chalne ke liye tiyar ho jao.

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Posted on June, 01 2014 03:20:52 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

Sipahi ( aik aurat se) khatoon! Jis car ne aap ko takkar mari thi aap ne is ka number to dekha hoga?

Khatoon (sonchte huye): nahi mein ne is ka number nahi dekha albattah us car mein aik smart si aurat baithi thi. Is ne pink rung ka soot pehna hua tha. Jis ka kapra 60 Rs meter wala tha, is key right hand mein ring thi jis mein naqli hira laga hua tha aur balon mein pital ka clip tha jis par sone ka pani charha tha.

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Posted on June, 01 2014 03:22:02 PM

mak412

Age: 29

3870 days old here
Total Posts: 1290
Points : 11

Location:
sargodha, Pakistan

Status : Offline

School teacher ne bachon ko Newton ka waqiya sunaya. Aik din Newton baagh mein saib ke darakht ke niche baitha tha keh is ke sar par aik saib aa gira aur yun is ne kashish e saqal ka osool dryaft kar lia.

Phir is ne bachon se poocha: aap ne is baat se kia sabaq hasil kia?

Aik bacha bola: yahi keh school se ghaib hona kitni achi baat hai, agar Newton is din school gia hota to yeh osool kabhi dryaft na hota.

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Posted on June, 01 2014 03:23:16 PM

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