A News Reporter

An idiot news reporter covered the news in this fashion:21 idiot fishermen are reportedly killed catching a fish in deep sea,the missing 9 have lodged a protest on why their case was not properly prioritized.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 989 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

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TEACHER: John, how would you

TEACHER: John, how would you spell “crocodile”?
JOHN: “K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L”

TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
JOHN: Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I would spell it!

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Tabiyat nai Theek

santa: yaar tu to aaj doctor k paas jaraha tha, gaya q nahi?

.

banta:yaar woh me kal jaonga aaj meri tabiyet kharab hai..

by Kashif (few years ago!)
pathan to admi on mobile

1 Pathan ko 1 Aadmi Mobile per tang karta tha:

1 din Pathan ne new Sim khareed kar usay msg kya.

Maine woh Number band kar k nai sim le li hai.

Ab tang kar k dikhao Bachoo.

by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)
Stop Giving Lectures Girls

Lady: Do you smoke?
Man: Yes
Lady: How many packs a day?
Man: 3 packs
Lady: How much per pack
Man: £10.00
Lady: And how long have you been
smoking?
Man: 15 years
Lady: So 1 pack cost £10.00 and you
have 3 packs a day which puts your
spending each month at £900. In
one year, it would be £10,800
correct?
Man: Correct
Lady: If in 1 year you spend
£10,800 not accounting for inflation,
the past 15 years puts your
spending at £162,000 correct?
Man: Correct
Lady: Do you know that if you
hadn’t smoked, that money could
have been put in a step-up interest
savings account and after
accounting for compound interest
for the past 15 years, you could
have now bought a Ferrari?
Man: Do you smoke?
Lady: No
Man: Where’s your fucking Ferrari
then?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Talking about sports

When design engineers get together they often talk about football.

When Middle management meet, they talk about tennis.

When top management meet they talk golf.

Conclusion: The higher you climb in the corporate ladder the smaller your balls become.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
A burglar

A burglar has just made it into the house he's intending ransacking, and he's looking around for stuff to steal. All of a sudden, a little voice pipes up, "I can see you, and so can Jesus!"

Startled, the burglar looks around the room. No one there at all, so he goes back to his business.

"I can see you, and so can Jesus!"

The burglar jumps again, and takes a longer look around the room. Over in the corner by the window, almost obscured by curtains, is a cage in which sits a parrot, who pipes up again, "I can see you, and so can Jesus!"

"So what," says the burglar, "you're only a parrot!"

To which the parrot replies, "Maybe, but Jesus is a rottweiler!"

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
2 Rotiyan Khaya Karo!

Doctor: Motape ka 1 hi Elaaj Hai.
Tum Rozana Sirf 2 Rotiyan Khaya Karo!

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Pathan:
2 Rotiyan khane se pehle khani hy ya Khane k bad?

by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)
Sari Phuljadiyan Yhi Rehti Hai

Child: Mom Isbar Hum Patakhe Is Shopse Lenge

Mom: Lekin Beta Ye To Girls Hostel Hai

Child: Papa To Kehte Hai Ki Sari Phuljadiyan Yhi Rehti Hai

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Pathan

PHATAN GHALTI SY SAMANDER ME GIR GIA .
DHOBTE DHOBTE US K HATH ME MACHLI AA GAI.
USAY PAKER KER BAHIR PHENKA OR KAHA
JAO TUM TU APNA JAAN BACHAO …
HAMARA ALLAH MALIK HAI

by Haris abbas Qureshi (few years ago!)
Arithmatic

If I had five coconuts and I gave you three, how
many would I have left ? I don't know.
Why not ? In our school we do all our arithmetic in
apples and oranges

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
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