Teacher: Apka beta cigarate peeta hai
Teacher: Apka beta cigarate peeta hai. Aap kabhi use puchhte nahi?
Santa: Haan, puchhta hoon, par mujhe kabhi deta hi nahi.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 614 views
Similar Jokes
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.
6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.
11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.
18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!
22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.
24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.
25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.
26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.
28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teachr: Tum bade ho kar kya kroge?
Santa: Shadi
Teachr: Nahi, mera mtlab kya banoge?
Santa: DADDY
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Teacher:
Batao Daryaaft or Ejaad mein kya farq hy?
Student:
Mere baap ne meri maa ko Daryaft kya aur phr dono ne mil kr mujhy Ejad kya
by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)
Eik Charsi Nay Doston Ki Dawat Ka Program Banaya,
Aur Apnay He Ghar Say Raat Ko Bakra Chori Kia,
Aur Khoob Dawat Ki,
Subha Jab Ghar Poncha
To Bakra Ghar Main Tha,
Bivi Say Pocha Bakra Kahan Say Aya? Bivi:
Bakray Ko Goli Maro!!
Ye Batao Raat Ko Tum Choron Ki Tarha
KUTAY Ko Kahan Lay Kar Gay Thay??
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Boss: Tumhare Father ka kya naam hai?
Servant: Bijli Deen
Boss: Ye kaisa naam hai?
Servant: Sir, pehle unka naam Chiraag Deen tha,
lakin jab se Science ne taraki ki hai unhon ne apna
naam Bijli Deen rakh lya ha
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of
the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now,
class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you
know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the
face."
"Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I
am standing upright in the ordinary positions the
blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Because your feet aren't
empty."
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Pathan Kone Me Chup K Mobile Pe Kisi Se
Ahista Se Bat Kr raha Tha
Aadmi: Khan Sahab Larki Se Baten Kr rahe Ho
Pathan: Khuda Ka Qasam Larki Nahi Mangetar Hai.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Agar Shahjahan Hum Jaisa Hota,
Agar Shahjahan Hum Jaisa Hota,
Kis Kis Ke Liye Banata Taj
Hamein To Nazar Aati Hai Har Larki Mumtaz
by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Boy: Papa mjhe Nokrani se pyar hy Mei us se shadi kronga.
Major Rohail: Nokarani ko rani banane ka na socho.
Boy: Kyu?
Major Rohail: Yehi galti mei ne b ke thi beta.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream
That u were sending me
Jewelery and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw
your dad paying the bill !!!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)