These two Scottish
These two Scottish characters are chatting. One of them then pulls out an expensive looking pocket watch from his pocket to check the time.
"That's a fine watch you got there!" says the other.
"Yeah it is, isn't it? I got it from my grandfather," says the guy with the watch. "Really?"
"Yeah, he sold it to me on his death bed."
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 1010 views
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1 LADY APNE BOY FRND K SAATH GHUM RHI THI
,
ITNE ME USKA HUSBND AGYA OR USKE Boy Frnd KO
PITNE LGA.
.
LADY-MAR SALE KO,APNI BIWI GHUMATE NAI
,
DUSRE KI BWI KO GHUMANE LE ATE H.
.
(fir boyfrnd ko josh aya gya or wo husbnd ko mrne lga)
lady-mar sale ko,na khud ghumane le jata h na kisi or ko
ghumane deta he
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
This elderly lady, recently widowed, decides to see if a pet will ease her loneliness and goes to the pet store. She decides against puppies, kitties, etc., and is about to leave the store when she hears a voice saying, "My, do you look lovely this afternoon, madam."
She turns around quickly to see who has spoken, but there is no one. All she sees is a big green parrot, resting on his perch in his cage. "Did you say that?" she asks.
"Why, yes, I did!" he replies. "And may I add that dress is a very nice color for you."
The lady suddenly realizes how nice it would be to not only have a talking parrot, but one that paid such nice compliments. So she pays for him and takes him home. On the way, she says, "You know, I am so proud of you that I believe I'll take you out for dinner! Would you like that?"
The parrot says, "Why yes, that would be delightful. I know a charming place on 7th Street."
So they arrive home and the lady progresses upstairs to her room to change for dinner, bringing the parrot along, of course. When the woman enters the building, the parrot begins complaining, swearing, and even bit her once.
Well, the woman is flabbergasted! She grabs the parrot by the throat, marches down the stairs into the basement, and stuffs the parrot in the freezer. She leaves him there in the freezer for five long minutes before taking him back out. The parrot is very cold.
She says, "Well? Have you learned your lesson? I will not tolerate such language in my house!"
The parrot says, "Okay, okay, I promise it won't happen again. I am deeply sorry."
Within five minutes, he is cursing again and bit her once on the arm and once on the finger.
The lady is absolutely stunned. She rips the parrot out of his cage, goes down the stairs, into the cellar, and, slam, into the freezer. This time, she leaves him in there for fifteen minutes.
When she finally takes him out, the parrot is one step away from death. He is shivering and has light frost on the beak. "I swear it will never ever happen again! I will never insult you again! I promise!" As he thaws, he looks up at the lady and says, "I do have one question though. That turkey in there, what'd he do, attack you?"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Charsi Qabristan Me Churs P Rha Tha.
Police: Kya Kr Rhe Ho ?
Chrsi: Abu K Lia Dua.
Police: Ye To Bache Ki Qabr Hy.
Chrsi: Abu Bachpan Me Hi Mrgye Thy.:-)
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
A Meeting With the Board After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church board after the service. The first man to arrive was a stranger. “You misundersto ...
by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Teacher: jisko kaan sunaayi nahi deta hai, aap use kya bulaate hai?
Santa: kuch bhi bulaa sakte hai. kyunki use sunaayi nahi detaa hai na.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Major Rohail ka inteqal ho gya.
Uska dost uske B.V k pas aya aur bola:
Kya mei us ke jga le skta hun?
.
B.V:Mujhe tu koe etraaz nhe
.
.
.
Qabristan walo se pooch lo !!
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
Doctor: Kaise Aana Hua?
Santa: Doc Sab, Tabiyat Theek Nahi hai, Liver mein Pain ho raha hai
Doc: Daroo Peete ho??
Santa: Haan, Par Chhota Peg hi Banana.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Maths Teacher Class Mein Padhate Hue Kahta Hai.
Teacher: “Jab Main Tumhare Jitna Tha, Mere Maths Mein 100 Marks Aate The”
Pappu Ne Ye Suna Aur Hanste Hue Teacher Ko Bola
Pappu: “Aate Honge Sir Ji, Aap Ko Koi Achha Teacher Padhata Hoga“
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
PATHANO ne EID k baad 5 waqt ki namaz b Saudia k sath parhne ka faisla kiya hai
Naye timings ye hon ge:
Fajr: Subha 8 baje
Zohr: spehr 4 baje
Asr: Raat 8.30 baje
Maghrib: Raat 10 baje
(Suraj gharoob hona shart nai)
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
Doctor: bantaji, khaane baad neend ki goliya lee na aapne.
Banta: uff!! khaane ke baad zor se neend aa raha tha to maine goli lena bhool gaya
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)