At a recent COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated that:

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got1,000 miles to the gallon."

General Motors has issued a press release stating:

1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you
would just accept this, restart and drive on.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car XP" or "Car 2000". But then you would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive, but would only work on 5% of the roads.

7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning light would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the justice dept.

12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn to
drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

13. You would press the "start " button to shut off the engine.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 1015 views

kya aap mujhe us

Student:-sir, kya aap mujhe us kaam ke liye bhi saza denge jo main nahin kiya hai?

Adhyapak:-nahin nahin,bilkul nahin.

Student:-sir, maine aaj ka homework nahin kiya hai.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

Police team drwaze pr aai,

Police team drwaze pr aai,

Pathan BV se:bandooq or kartoos kahan hen?

Police team bhagi, peche se pathan ne awaz di:
Ruko bhai, ye mere bachon k naam hen...

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

pathan at shop

Pathan at Shop: Bhai 1 Rupay ka Easyload Kardo.

Shopkeeper: Itna Load Karwa k Call Karni Hai ya SMS.
Pathan: Karna to Kuch Nahi,

Bus Aise He Paise Urrane Ki Aadat Hai.

by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)

Altaf Hussain Hajj karny gaye,

Altaf Hussain Hajj karny gaye,
.
Jab woh Shaitaan ko Kankariyan maarny lagy to aawaz aai,
.
"BHAI"...
.
Aapne yahan aany ki Zehmat kyon ki? Mujhe London bula liya hota.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

Sardar Jee and Pray

A sardar prays daily for 2 hours,
"He Vahe Guru meri lottery lagade."

After 11 years Vahe Guru angrily appeared & said,"Khoti de puttar 1 vari ticket to le le"

by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)