At a recent COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated that:

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got1,000 miles to the gallon."

General Motors has issued a press release stating:

1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you
would just accept this, restart and drive on.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car XP" or "Car 2000". But then you would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive, but would only work on 5% of the roads.

7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning light would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the justice dept.

12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn to
drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

13. You would press the "start " button to shut off the engine.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 1063 views

Molvi aur Halwa

1 Molvi dua mang raha tha
kash shahadt ki moat mil jaye
Pathan:ye nhi ho skta.
Molvi:wo Q?
Pathan:Jahad pe to tu ne jana nhi or
halwe may ksi ne bomb rkhna nhi.

by Aurangzeb Khan Tunio (few years ago!)

Mitthu, Jalebi khyega

Sardar apne tota SE :Mitthu,
Jalebi khyega
TOTA : Bagairta Khud Kha le.
Phle Mirchi khila-khila k
Bawaaseer karwa di ab Sugar
bhi krwyega kya

by tanveer hussain (few years ago!)

Schools moment everyone had

A Moment Which Almost Came In Everyone's School Life
.

When A Teacher Points At You And U Look Behind And Then Say

"Who? Me?" =O :P

by Muhammad Zeeshan (few years ago!)

Teacher asks Girl

Teacher asks Girl:
Which part of Human body
Expands 10 times its normal size..?

Girl: I can’t answer this question
I feel shy…!

Teacher asks same question to a boy.

Boy replies: Its the Pupil of Human Eye.

Teacher: Right!

Then turns to the girl:
Listen girl your thinking is wrong
and your expectations are too high.

by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)

X-RAY

Doctor: X-RAY Me Aap Ki Haddi Tooti Hoi He Mareez: Chalo Shukar He X-RAY Me Hi Tooti He Agar Assal Me Tooti Hoti To Kaafi Kharcha Hota :P

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)