Food One-liners

The snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called "The Fission Chips."

On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack.

A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry.

A couple of kids tried using pickles for a Ping-Pong game. They had the volley of the Dills.

The four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant, and Chocolate.

A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.

Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you.

Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."

I thought you were trying to get into shape?

I am. The shape I've selected is a triangle.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 1045 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

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Some idiots say

S0me idi0t say:
"Behind every succesful b0y there is a girl"
but n0b0dy knows the fact that:
"Girls ch0ose only succesful b0ys"

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Yar meri biwi pani se

Banta: Yar meri biwi pani se bohat darti hai.
Friend: Acha wo kaise?
Banta: Yar kal mein ghar gaya to wo bathtub mai
bhi security guard k sath bethi thi!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
What comes first

Lecturer: What comes first - Sun or Moon?

Student: Obviously Moon.

Lecturer: How?.. Student: Abe Dhakkan Honey'MOON', k baad hi to 'SON' Ayega na...

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Raping a girl

Santa is raping a girl. Girl shouting,
Santa : Chillao yahan se tumhari awaz bahar nahi ja
sakti,
Girl : Mujhe yakin nahi aata,
Santa : Theek hai mein yahan chillata hun tum
bahar jaake suno aawaz aati hai ya nahi?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Wife or Mistress

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.

The architect said, “I enjoyed time with my wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.

The artist said, “I enjoyed time with my mistress, because of the passion and mystery I found there.”

The engineer said, "I like both."

"Both?" they questioned.

The Engineer said, "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
coke

1 Aurat Coke Pi Rahi Thi Achanak Us Mein Se 1 Machar Nikla Aur Bola
MAA
Aurat: Main Teri MAA Nahi Hoon
Machar: Aisa Na Bol MAA
Main Teri “Coke” Se Nikla Hoon.

by Abdul Sami (few years ago!)
Tumhari mmumy ne mera dil tod diya

father: Tumhari mmumy ne mera dil tod diya, isliye mai sharab p rha hu.

sonu:mummy ne meri pocket money b rok d, isliye mere liye b 1 glass lagao papa.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Nokrani Maalkin apki purani sarhee

Nokrani:Maalkin apki purani sarhee muje nai chaiye.

Malkin: Kyun? Nokrani:Apki saree pehenne k bad sahab

"Aap"Ko samajh k mere paas b nai aate.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Shadi se Pehly aur shadi k baad

Shadi se Pehly::

Larka: Kash wo din ajaye..
..
Larki: Tum mujhe chorr tau nhi dogy?
. .
Larka: Nhi aisa sochna bhi mat. .
. .
Larki: kia ap mujhe miss karogy?
. .
Larka: han..
. .
Larki: tmhari zindagi ma koi aur nhi?
. .
Larka: nhi tau..
. .
Larki: kia tum mujh se mohabt krtay ho?
. .
Larka: han jaan
. .
Larki: Oh jaan
==============

shadi k baad isi ko nichy se upar parrhen..
:D :D

by WAQAR (few years ago!)
Man comes home

Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.

He shoots his friend to death.
Wife says, “If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends”.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
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