A Driving School Test
The following are a sampling of real answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school.
Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."
Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too drunk to find your keys.
Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if she is cute.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.
Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics.
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A: Carry loaded weapons.
Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
A: It would be tough to be an idiot all day long.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 963 views
Similar Jokes
BUSH:
Humary pass
Britny
Julie Robert
Anjelina Joli
sab ha!
Tumre pass
kya hay?
MANMOHN SINGH:
Humary pass Imran Hashmi he!
Bhej do sab ko
by Abdul Sami (few years ago!)
Best Sms of 1947.
.
.
Tab Mobile tha kya?
Kabhie to thora dimagh ka istamaal kar liye karo!
Bas Sms parhne ki lagi rehti hai..
by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
3 charsi motorcycle per ja rahe the
Darmyan wle ko AWAZ sunai di
““““ thaaaaaa ““““`
Usne apne aagy wale se pocha
“Goli tenu vajji a?”
usne kaha ‘nai’.
usne apne peechy wale se pocha
“te fer Goli tenu vajji a?”
wo b bola ‘nai’
Wo Khud neechy gir gya:
“Le fer Menu e vajji oou”
by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Afghanistan mein posted saabiq amreeki general McChrystal dismiss honay ke baad apnay hajjaam se baal katwa raha tha, hajjaam baar baar kahta.."Taliban.....Afghanistan"
Teen chaar baar sunnay ke baad saabiq jeneral ne hajjaam ko toka:
"ye tum har thorhi dair baad kion kahtay ho "Taliban, Afghanistan"?
hajjam haath jorh ker bola:
"sir, aap ke baal jism se chipkay huway hein, jub mein Taliban or Afghanistan ka naam leta hunn to khof se aap ke baal kharhay ho jaatay hein or yunn mein aasani se baal kaat leta hunn."
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Laloo's Son: Dad, how much does it cost to get married.
Funny Laloo: I never calculated, I am still paying for it.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Aik sahib ne apne naye mulazam se kaha& ja kar bazaar se aalu or gost le aao.
nokar ne kaha……janab main is sher main niya hun kahin kho jaon, chunacha woh sahib khud hi bazaar se saman le aye. ghar aa kar unho ne nokar se kaha ke lo ab pakao. is ne jawab diyaise sui gas par pakana nahi aata. in sahib ne khud khana tyar kar liya. phir mulazim ko awaz di aao khana kha lo. who bola”bar bar inkar karna acha nahi lagta. muje sharam aa rehi hay is liye kha leta hun.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Husband & Wife were Fighing
Husband says: Tu Sali Kuti! Wife Reply:
Tu Sala Kuta! the Child Of them was near, he says : hi-hi-hi-hi-hi Mian Sala Kutoora.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
1 memon ne arbi ko khoon dey k uski jaan bachai.
Arbi ne usay MERCEDES gift kardi.
Arbi ko phir khoon ki zarorut pari,
Memon ne phir khoon dia.
Ab k bar Arbi ne till waly laddu gift kiye,
Memon:Ghusse se, mercedez kion nahi di?
Arbi:Munna…!!
Ab hamarey ander bhi memono ka khoon dor raha hay:)
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Food quotes, quips, and thoughts . . .
"Artichokes ... are just plain annoying ... After all the trouble you go to, you get about as much actual 'food' out of eating an artichoke as you would rom licking thirty or forty postage stamps. Have the shrimp cocktail instead." -- Miss Piggy
"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found." --Sam Levinson
"This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them." -- Gracie Allen
"I've been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I've lost a total of 789 pounds. By all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet." -- Erma Bombeck
"I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster." -- Joe E. Lewis
"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead -- not sick, not wounded -- dead." -- Woody Allen
"Food is an important part of a balanced diet." -- Fran Lebowitz
"Health food makes me sick." -- Calvin Trillin
"Watermelon -- it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face." -- Enrico Caruso
"Old people shouldn't eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get." -- Robert Orben
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Memon K Ghar Se Choontiyan Ja Rahen Thin…
Memon: Kahan Ja Rahi Ho ? Choonti:
Bhai Bhooka Marnay Se To Behtar Hai Hijrat Kar Jaeyn…
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)