Customar (hotel manger se-subah ke waqt mai baid
pe breajfast lena pasnd krta hu
Manegar-no problam lekin apko apna bed neche
restra me lana hoga

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!) / 705 views

GM Like Computer Industry

At a recent COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated that:

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got1,000 miles to the gallon."

General Motors has issued a press release stating:

1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you
would just accept this, restart and drive on.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car XP" or "Car 2000". But then you would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive, but would only work on 5% of the roads.

7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning light would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the justice dept.

12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn to
drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

13. You would press the "start " button to shut off the engine.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

Admi gor gor kr dehk rha hai

Wife:Dekho na Wo aadmi mujhe Ghur Ghur k Dekh
raha hai.
Husband:Are wo toh Bhangarwala hai,Bekar mal psr
nazar rakhna Uski aadat hai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

hamaare shantabai

Patni: dekhoji, hamaare shantabai ki pati, usko khush rakhne ke liye, har hafte movie pe le jaate hai. aap kyu nahi karte ho aise?
Pati: arey, maine bhi shantabai ko movie ke liye bulaaya. lekin usne manaa kardi. isme meri kya galti hai?

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

The captain of a team says to the Umpire

The captain of a team says to the Umpire,
“My players want to know if there is a penalty for thinking.”
The Umpire says, “No.”
The captain says,
“Well we think you’re an asshole, then.”

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

pathan

Teacher to pathan:
batao Pakistan ka jhanda sub se pehle kahan lehraya gya?
Pathan boht dair sochnay k bad bola:
Hawa mei….

by Haris abbas Qureshi (few years ago!)