Military; 33 Jokes

Putting bomb

Kaliya & Peeliya ek car me bomb laga rahe the .
Peeliya - agar bomb lagate samay phat gaya to
kya hoga .
Kaliya - do'nt worry ! Mere paas ek aur bomb hai

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Petrol pump se 4km door 1 foji gaari ka

Petrol pump se 4km door 1 foji gaari ka petrol khatam hogya.
2nd seat per major sb bethe the


Pathan Driver:

ab petrol pump tk dhaka lagana parega
sab neche utre or dhaka lagana shru krdia or
kafi der bad petrol pump pr pohnch gye.
kuch jawan thak k behosh hogye


PATHAN Driver ne petrol dalwana shru kia to
major sab ne kaha k peche jo drum hy us me b dalwa lo


PATHAN:
sir wo to full hy
Major: What?


Driver:yes sir wo
Emergency k lye rakha hy! :p ;

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
A phatan joined Army & was given a Gun.

A phatan joined Army & was given a Gun.
Phatan: Sir, is ki naali apni taraf rakhun ya dushman ki taraf?
Major: kisi bhi taraf rakh le faida mulk ka hi ho ga.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
aik foji train main ja raha tha

aik foji train main ja raha tha aur aik police wala samnay baitha tha

police walay nay poocha kay chuti pay ja rahay ho to foji nay kaha haan meri bivi ko bacha hua hai

police walay nay kaha kay kitnay arsay bahad ja rahay ho

foji bola 2 saal bahab

police wala phir to bacha haram ka hua

foji haan main bhee to usko police main bharti kara doon ga

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
A phatan joined Army & was given a Gun.

A phatan joined Army & was given a Gun.
Phatan: Sir, is ki naali apni taraf rakhun ya dushman ki taraf?
Major: kisi bhi taraf rakh le faida mulk ka hi ho ga.

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
1 srdar fauj ma brti howa

1 srdar fauj ma brti howa 2 din bad jang
lg gai Srdar ki topi pa goli lagi..
Srdar ne hathyar phaink deya Or chup kr
bola Aqalmand k liye ishara hi kafi ha..

by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
A phatan joined Army

A phatan joined Army A phatan joined Army & was given a Gun.

Phatan: Sir, is ki naali apni taraf rakhun ya dushman ki taraf?

Major: kisi bhi taraf rakh le faida mulk ka hi ho ga.

by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
enemy tanks

Soldier 2 General: Sir a small enemy group is attacking

General: Quick bring me my red shirt

After enemy defeated..

Soldier: sir why the red shirt?

General: In red shirt if i got shot my soldiers would not see my blood so they wont be discouraged

Soldier: sir 100 enemy tanks are attacking

General: Get me my yellow pant

by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)
A Pakistani army soldier walks

A Pakistani army soldier walks into his officer's room.

To impress him, the army office picks the phone, dials a number and said "Yes sir, I understand sir. I will tell the Prime Minister. Goodbye."

Looking at the soldier he barked "What do you want?"
"Nothing sir." he replied. "I just came to install your telephone

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Musharraf joined Pakistani army

Musharraf joined Pakistani army and was given a gun.

Musharraf asked his Officer: Sir, to what side should I point its nozzle, towards myself or to the opposite side.

Officer: Stupid, keep it anyway, in both the cases it will benefit the nation.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
How will you destroy a submarine

How will you destroy a submarine full of sardars ?

Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Captain of Military

Captain of Military: Naujawanon aage bado

Santa aage nahin bada

Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade?

Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Santa’s Army Test

Santa’s Army Test

Pappu- 3+5?
Santa- 8
Pappu- 7+3?
Santa- 10
Pappu- 8+8?
Santa- Pata nahi sir
Mere pass sirf 10 hi ungli Hai.
(=awaD o_0
W!LD T3XT3R

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Sab ka nishana chook gaya

Banta: Jab main paida hua tha to military walon ne 21 topein chalayeen thi.


Santa: Kamaal hai! Sab ka nishana chook gaya?

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
At ur age hitler commited suicide

Teacher : U failure !
At ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir,
but at ur age hitler commited suicide

by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)

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