Food Quotes And Quips

Food quotes, quips, and thoughts . . .

"Artichokes ... are just plain annoying ... After all the trouble you go to, you get about as much actual 'food' out of eating an artichoke as you would rom licking thirty or forty postage stamps. Have the shrimp cocktail instead." -- Miss Piggy

"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found." --Sam Levinson

"This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them." -- Gracie Allen

"I've been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I've lost a total of 789 pounds. By all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet." -- Erma Bombeck

"I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster." -- Joe E. Lewis

"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead -- not sick, not wounded -- dead." -- Woody Allen

"Food is an important part of a balanced diet." -- Fran Lebowitz

"Health food makes me sick." -- Calvin Trillin

"Watermelon -- it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face." -- Enrico Caruso

"Old people shouldn't eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get." -- Robert Orben

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 670 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

Similar Jokes

5 rupy ka sawal

Faqeer: 5 rupy ka sawal haI baba. . . !
.
.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.
SHaikH: puchoO shayad mujhay aata hO.

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Putting bomb

Kaliya & Peeliya ek car me bomb laga rahe the .
Peeliya - agar bomb lagate samay phat gaya to
kya hoga .
Kaliya - do'nt worry ! Mere paas ek aur bomb hai

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Afridi ne 6 mara.

2 charsi cricket match dekh rhay thy.
Afridi ne 6 mara.
Pehla charsi: Wah kiya goal kia hay.
Dusra charsi: Bewaquf goal is me nhi, cricket me
hota hay.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
DAD DID YOU EVER VISITED EGYPT

CHILD:DAD DID YOU EVER VISITED EGYPT DAD:NO

CHILD:THEN FROM WHERE DID YOU BRING "MUUUMMMI"

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Father to son

Father to son: If You don’t pass your Exams this time

Don’t you dare call me DAD,
After some days……..

Father asked:How is your result?
Son:Sorry Mr. Joseph.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
sardar

Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji.. aap papa ban gaye.."
Sardarji - " Meri wife ko nahi bolna.. main use SURPRISE doonga..!

by Hassaan (few years ago!)
Ijazat

Teacher:
Tum Baghair Ijazat Class Me Q Aaye??

Pappu:
Sir' Me Ijazat Leny Hi To Andar Aya Hun.. :-D

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Santa k ghar NAVJOT SINGH

Santa k ghar NAVJOT SINGH SIDDHU ki tasvir lagi hui thi

Banta: ye q laga rkhi hai..?

Santa: LAUGHING BUDDHA lene gaya tha dukandar ne kaha yeh LATEST hai..

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Meri fikar na kiya......

Teacher : you are late today,
school 7 baje lag jata hai or tum ab aa rahe ho???

Student : sir aap meri fikar na kiya kare
aap school shuru karwa diya kare.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Sardar: Aao Race Lagatay hain

Sardar: Aao Race Lagatay hain, Jo haara woh ek hazaar rupay dega.

Pathan: Lekin Mujhe Rasta nahi Maloom.

Sardar: Bus Tum meray peechay peechay aatay rehna.

Pathan: Thanks Yara..

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
  • Page 1 of 1
  • 1

Most Viewed Jokes

Sargodha is great

ZONG walon ki Awaz aye.

Khan Sahb Ki Flight Ma Tabya..

Cheel ko English Main kya Ke..

Bhikari: Mein bahut lachaar ..

Ashqi Wala Sher Sunao

Sardar makes call to airport

Santa to Banta

Yesterday I sent a fax

Rang gora karne wali cream

Existing Users Login
User ID
Password
 
 
Join Now / Forgot Password

also you can..
Login with Facebook