Food quotes, quips, and thoughts . . .

"Artichokes ... are just plain annoying ... After all the trouble you go to, you get about as much actual 'food' out of eating an artichoke as you would rom licking thirty or forty postage stamps. Have the shrimp cocktail instead." -- Miss Piggy

"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found." --Sam Levinson

"This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them." -- Gracie Allen

"I've been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I've lost a total of 789 pounds. By all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet." -- Erma Bombeck

"I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster." -- Joe E. Lewis

"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead -- not sick, not wounded -- dead." -- Woody Allen

"Food is an important part of a balanced diet." -- Fran Lebowitz

"Health food makes me sick." -- Calvin Trillin

"Watermelon -- it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face." -- Enrico Caruso

"Old people shouldn't eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get." -- Robert Orben

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 620 views

1 Bacha Ghar se Mar kha kr Ghusy me

:1 Bacha Ghar se Mar kha kr
Ghusy me School
ja raha tha.

Raste me kisi ne Pocha
Beta Parhty ho?

Bacha: Nai, uniform main teri maa ka Mujra dkhnay ja raha hoon…

by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)

stupid Dhiir pit gaya punjabi bolne

stupid Dhiir pit gaya punjabi bolne k chakker main..
Papita wali se papite kharidne k liye bola.
ooi.. ik pappy-ta-dede..

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

Doctor & mareez

doctor ne mareez se kaha ke tum ne jo cheque diya tha who cash hone ki bejaye wapis aa gya hay.mareez ne jawabdiya, “mera sar dard or bokhar bi to wapisaa gya hay na doctor sahib”

by Abdul Basit (few years ago!)

A sardar was running with his pregnent wife

A sardar was running with his pregnent wife,who
was about to deliver, when another sardar asked
him, O pernam singh, oye woti nu ais haal vitch le
ke kithey puj rya vain, pernam singh replied,assi
Pizza hut chaley aan, sunya aa othey free delivery
hondi aaa

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

Tumhari income nka source

Banta to Santa: Tumhaare income ka source kya
hai
Santa: Maine apne upper ka portion kisi ko rahane
kiraye par diya hai
Banta:kamaal hai wo pure din tumaher upper kaise
rahata hai

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)