Girl To Her Boy Friend
Girl To Her Boy Friend:Darling, Do You Know Handsome N Smart Boys Always Get Stupid Girl Friends.Boy: Thanks For The Compliment, Darling
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 561 views
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Patient to Doctor: Doctor sahab kia mein operation key baad cricket khelney qabil ho jaoon ga?
Doctor: Bilkul
Patient: Wah ji wah, mein pehley kabhi naheen khela
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
TEACHER: Jab Bijli Chamakti hai to Roshni Pehle Aur Awaaz baad me Kyu aati hai?
SANTA: Kyuki Hamari Aankh Aagey Aur Kaan Piche hai
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.
6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.
11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.
18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!
22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.
24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.
25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.
26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.
28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked: Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: I'm writing a letter to my 6 yr old son, he can''t read very fast.
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
Judge: You have been sentenced to death, however you can choose the way you want to die.
Accused: I want to die of old age, your honor
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Question: “Government Hospital Ke Doctor Aur Marij Mein Kya Similarity Hai?”
Answer: “Doctor Nurse Pe Aur Marij Farsh Pe Marta Hai“
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
SARDAR:- Yar iska matlab kya hota hai, "I AM GOING"?
FRIEND:- Main jaa raha hun.
SARDAR:- Saaley, aise kaise jayega, 20 aur bhi aise ja chuke hain....answer bata ke jaa..
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
BOYS stands for
B:BADMASHI mai sab sai agay
O:OLLU ki tara raat mai jagay
Y:YARIYIAN nebhaye jaan laga ke
S:SHAREEF sirf maa baaf ke samnay
by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Bachi ko jor-jor se roti dekhkar maa ne poocha- “kyo roti ho?”
Bachi- “Bhaiya ne meri gudiya tod di”
Maa- “Kaise? Kaise tod di?”
Bachi- “Maine gudiya uske sir par maari thi?”
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Pathan (Nurse se): Kia Doctor sahib ne abhi tak neend ki goli nahi bhaiji?
Nurse: Nahii
.
Pathan: Usay kaho jaldi karo, mujhe neend arahi hai, mai goliyon ke lie owr nahi jaag sakta
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)