Food and Drink; 252 Jokes

Cigarette chor di

Sonu-Tune Uss Ladki K Liye Cigratte Chhodi
Monu-Ha
Sonu-Daru
Monu-Ha
Sönu-To Shadi Q Nahi Ki
Monu-Itna Sudhar Gaya Tha Ki
Uss Se B Achi Mil Gayi..

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Thanda lo ge ya garm

Snta Mehmaan Se- Thnda Loge Ya Garam.?
Mehmaan-Dono Le Aao..
Snta-Preeto.. Ek GLass Freezer Se, Aur Ek GLass
Geezer Se Pani Le Aao..

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Parantho main aalu nazar nahin aa rhe

Ramu-Inn aalu k parantho mein aalu nazar nahin aa
rahe hai
Shyamu-Yaar naam par mat ja
Kashmiri pulav mei kabhi kashmir nazar aata hai
kya.?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Chilke smait kela

GOLU :chilkay samait KELA kha raha tha.
MOLU: Is ko cheel to lo.
GOLU: Cheelne ka kia zarurat hai,hum ko yaqeen
hai is k andar KELA he hai.:-)

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Lady goes to fruit market

Lady Goes to a Fruit Shop
Shopkeeper:Ur Dog is eating my Fruits
Lady:- Shona,Dont eat d Fruit without washing
them

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Santa amrud bech rha tha

Santa Amrud bech rha tha
Banta- Agar amrud me kida nikla to?
Santa-To saaf baat hai...
Phale Hi Bol dete hai
hum kide ke alag Paise Lenge

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Breakfasts lena passand kerta hun

Customar (hotel manger se-subah ke waqt mai baid
pe breajfast lena pasnd krta hu
Manegar-no problam lekin apko apna bed neche
restra me lana hoga

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
3 3 kabab le ker ao

Kanjus-Jao.
2 dukano se 3-3 kabab le k aao.
Servant-Janab..
6 ikhatte kyu nahi.
Kanjus-Nalaik Aadmi..!
Chatni 0r Piyaz Zyada mileygi

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Santa was cocking murgi

Santa was cooking Murgi,Wen he added Hara
Dhaniya guess wat Happened?The Murgi start
Dancing & Singing 'HUM PE YEH KISNE HARA
RANG DALA.MAAR DAALA.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Shrabi ko daru pete dehk

Sharabi ko Daru peta dekh American bola-Pani to
mila lo
Sharabi-Hum Indian hai itna pani to daru ko dekh
ke he muh me aa jata he

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Mithai rekhi hai

Banta santa se-teri dukan pe mitthai rakhi h tera
dil isko khane ko nhi krta,santa- yaar krta to bhut
h par papa marenge isliye chaat kar rakh deta hu

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Namak khtam ho gaya

Wife-Aji sunte ho ghar me namak khatam ho gaya h
daal me kya daalu.
husband-Dimaag to h hi nhi
naya colgate active salt daal de
usme namak hai..

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Machli khayega

Santa: oye banta machli khayega?
Banta:nahi yaar usme kaante hote hain.
Santa: oye chadd yaar, chappal pahen k kha lena.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
3 amrood

Santa: Yaar aaj to 1 Rs. me 3 amrood mil gye.
Banta: Wo kaise?
Snta: 1 Rs. ka 1 usne dia, 1 mai utha k bhag gya,
or 1 usne muje fek ke mara...

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Khana kon mangvata hai

Do memon hotel mein aik dusre ko mile...
4 din baad dono mar gaye...!
Wajah kya thi...?
Woh 4 din aik dusre ko dekhte rahe.. Ke khana kon
mangwaye ga...?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

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