Food and Drink; 252 Jokes

Once During The Tea Break

Once During The Tea Break
Between India And Pakistan Match….
Afridi Wanted Biscuits Wid His Tea…
Inspite Of Asking Sachin For The Biscuits
Who Was Close By To The Biscuits Plate…

He Called Inzy Who Was Standin Far Away….
Why So…?

Socho…..
Socho Socho………
Coz “Haq Se Mango Priya Gold”…

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
An big Elephant is drinking

An big Elephant is drinking out of a river when he spots a turtle asleep on a log. The elephant ambles over and kicks the unsuspecting turtle clear across the river.
"Why did you do that?" asks a passing giraffe.

"Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 47 years ago."

"Wow, what a memory!" says the giraffe.

"Yes," says the elephant. "Turtle recall."

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Pakstani Walima me khana khane k 2 rules:

Pakstani Walima me khana khane k 2 rules:
One: Pehli bar is tarha khao k doosri bar milega nhi
Two: Doosri bar is tarha khao k pehli bar mila hi nhi tha

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
oye banta machli khayega?

Santa: oye banta machli khayega?
Banta: nhi yaar usme kaante hote hain.
Santa: oye chadd yaar, chappal pahen ke kha lena.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar Halwayi se

Sardar Halwayi se: Tum kitny salon se Jalebi bana rahy ho?
Halwayi baray fakhar se: 20 saal se
Sardar: Bari sharam ki baat hai tum se aaj tak Jalebi seedhi nahi bani

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
apko keley ka chilka nazar nahi aya

Doctor to Sheikh: apko keley ka chilka nazar nahi aya jo ap phisal gai?
Sheikh: main to paon rakh k dekh raha tha k chilkey mein kela to ni hai

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Reporter To Meera: What Is Your Favorite Dish & Drink?

Reporter To Meera: What Is Your Favorite Dish & Drink?
MEERA: Mother Of Potato & one Leg Mango Juice
Reporter: Main Samjha Nahi!?

MEERA: Oh My God! You Pendu’s, Ek To Tum Peoples Ko English Nahi Aati. Main Ne Kaha Mujhe
Aaloo Keema aur Langray Aam Ka Juice Pasand Hai

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
anta: oye banta machli khayega?

anta: oye banta machli khayega?
Banta: nhi yaar usme kaante hote hain.
Santa: oye chadd yaar, chappal pahen ke kha lena.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Boy : Mein tumhay gallay lga Sakta hoo

Boy : Mein tumhay gallay lga Sakta hoo, withOut touching !
.
Girl : Impossible
.
Boy : Lagi shartt ek “Pepsi” Ki ??
.
Girl : Ok
.
Boy ne zor Se gallay lgaya …
.
Girl : Hey ! You touched me
.
.
.
Boy : han to ro q rahi ho???
laa rha hoo na pepsi..

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Caller: hello Pizza Hunt ??

Caller: hello Pizza Hunt ??

Pizza Hunt: yes sir

Caller: 1 large pizza, 2 small pizza aur ek coke
bhejo

Pizza hunt: Kiske naam pe bheju sir ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Caller: Allah ke Naam pe dede baba…

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Sardar Apni Wife Ke Sath Coffee Shop Gaya

Sardar Apni Wife Ke Sath Coffee Shop Gaya, hot Coffee order Ki, Coffee Atte Hi wife Se Bola Jaldi Jaldi pee. Wife Boli Kyu? Sardar Bola Hot coffe Rs. 5 and Cold Coffee Rs. 10.00

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Pathan Dukan Se Baraf Lene Gaya.

Pathan Dukan Se Baraf Lene Gaya.
Baraf Se Dhuan Niklta Hua Dekh Kr Bola ...
'Wah Kocha, Sab Ko Thandi Deta Hy Aur Hum Ko GARAM Deta Hy.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Roti to tu bhi de sakta hai

Bhikhari ne Awaaz
lagayi- Babu ji roti
milegi??.
-
-
Andar se awaz aai -Biwi
ghar par nahi hai..
-
-
-
Bhikhari- Chumma nahi
maanga saale, Roti to tu bhi de sakta hai

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Santa was smoking in front of his father.

Santa was smoking in front of his father.
His friend- Oye papa ke samne smoking kar raha hai?
Santa- Baap hai, koi petrol pump thori hai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
SANTA: Rasgulle hain?

SANTA: Rasgulle hain?
DUKANDAAR: Nahi
SANTA: Dekh lunga
DUKANDAAR (Gusse me): Kya dekh loge?
SANTA: Dusri dukaan me jakar dekh loonga!

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)

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